i don't know. i just really enjoy wearing my sunglasses inside. and they are so scene. silver leopard print, with hot pink inside the frame. i am proud. hence my bragging. so silly. so i'm abandoning everyone i know at the end of the week. i'm happy too. i don't really think they understand the things i understand. plus with my extended absence homecoming is always so nice. it adds to my novelty. (because i'm a product without a vendor.) and as dan remarked, i am a "connoisseur of wierd things." so here. have a wierd thing that i love. i don't really know where i'm going with that... when i'm fucked up on adderall, it's like i can't stop smiling. i'm so euphoric right now. baby, the songs in my head turn into something so intense i can't stop myself from feeling. i feel every bit. and a bonus is now i understand verb tenses. that means i'm going to pass my french final tomorrow. high five to myself. i don't even care that i can't see, i'm still going to wear my sunglasses. fuck you. i run this place.

it's thundering right now. i'm pretty sure that the clouds are hungry. and that thunder is just their tummies growling. because they're starving up there. and no one will feed them. hence their rainy tears. awww. i've been a fan of my life lately. i feel like it's all falling into place. i'm comfortable in my skin. me and danielle are becoming what is known as "scene". a change of identity is always healthy, i believe. i think my subconscious is angry at me. or trying to make a point. i can't decide which. because i should have died last week. i was in a horrible car accident. and i was virtually unharmed. minus the bruising on my legs. i was hit head on. my tiny little baby of a car was impaled by an oncoming SUV. and i am fine. i looked before i turned. i know i did. i saw no SUV. there was no oncoming traffic. but secretly. i believe i did see the SUV. i think i wanted the crash. i've been fantasizing about getting impaled, mangled, crushed ever since i first got my license. how easy would it be to wrap my car around another and just let go. too easy. terribly and horribly easy. that's insane. i'm dumb. i was in a car accident. i feel very enlightened. i'm rising above people around me. transcending. Watchout! There's Ghosts is my new favorite band. and Invisible Monsters is my new favorite book. and i suggest them both to anybody. everybody. i think you would like them.