It's March already. I just read through all of these journal entries that I had posted last summer and one thought lingered in my mind: boy did I have it good. I supposed I hadn't written anything between now and last September because it's been so hard to, it would have been impossible to write anything without tears stinging my eyes. Yes, I'm talking about Eddie, and lately I've been thinking about him more than I should be. We broke up in early October, which is why I officially name October the most damned and depressing month of the year. Life has been shaky since then. He broke all his promises he had made to me, every single one of them, and all in one day, he just changed. He stopped wearing band t-shirts, he stopped caring about me, he even cut all his gorgeous hair off. I swear, everything about him is different, and I suppose I was the one to get everything dumped on. From October to December, things were nothing but in a downfall. They were the hardest three months of my life, and that's really saying something. I don't want to talk much about the breakup itself, but let's just say, it's as if it wasn't even him doing it. I recall the very moment of it happening in my mind right now and even now, I feel pained. Things got better in mid-December. I decided to have a little fun so I got to know Tyler Garlisi a little bit better. We ended up having a fun, enjoyable relationship, beginning with the first minute of 2009. However, over time things got a little undesirably hard to maintain. A relationship should be something that you enjoy, not something you struggle to keep going. So I broke up with him not too long ago actually, maybe two and a half weeks ago. That took me no time to get over, compared to Eddie. See, I still find myself thinking about him every single day. And lately, I've been staying up until two in the morning just writing songs and playing the guitar (I finally got my own guitar to play for Christmas). I want to call him and see how he's doing. I see him quite often, at school and church still. It kind of sucks. But every time I think about talking to him, I remind myself of the awful experiences he put me through in the fall, the worst season of the year, I have now denounced, and I remind myself of all the promises he broke. I cut myself once. I regretted it. Nobody is worth a human being's bloodshed. This all seems a little too emotional. I'll be honest, I've been having a great time lately. It's Spring Break, and Liana and Tyler (yes, my ex, we're friends still) and CJ and I are going up to Atlanta Friday to see A Day To Remember, The Devil Wears Prada, and Sky Eats Airplane. I'm so excited! And I get to see Brian Hodges from Covecrest, I really hope I do. Him and I have been texting lately. I'm in track right now and things have been going great, I'm pretty sure I will letter this year, unlike last year when I failed miserably with my terrible attitude, ha. The beach has also been nice, although I've got a sunburn currently. I'd say things have been going alright, now that I've completely disaffiliated myself from the male race and dating. It's great, I'm trying to keep it that way and stay out of "trouble" haha. This summer is going to be hard to top, to say the least.