i'm grounded. i'm just going to keep doing these. first song: the places you have come to fear the most by dashboard confessional second song: homeless by paul simon third song: perfect company by a cursive memory fourth song: good will hunting by myself by ludo fifth song: impact by stick to your guns sixth song: body like mind by ace enders and a million different people seventh song: in the backseat by arcade fire eighth song: making love to the camera by the starting line ninth song: let's ride by josh-x-an-tus tenth song: forever by chris brown who does song 1 remind you of? myself what part of your life does song 2 remind you of? last summer if you could dedicate song 3 to anyone, who would it be? nick, obviously :] does song 4's lyrics mean anything to you personally? hahaha no, they're just hysterical why do you like song 5? because its by stick to your guns. when did you first start listening to the artist of song 6? well, i've been listening to the early november since like 2004. and i've been listening to ace enders &amdp since TEN broke up. so like, 2007? i think? how many albums do you have from the artist of song 7? no full ones, but i have a little from each album. wait, scratch that, actually i think i have neon bible. how are songs 8 and 9 similar? they're not. at all. what's song 10's meaning? dancing. yanno. which song out of the 10 is your favorite? 1 & 6 which song out of the 10 is your least favorite? 9 which song means the most to you? why? 1, 6, 10 :] would you dedicate any of these to your love/crush? 3 & 10! would you dedicate any of theses to your enemy? nah do these 10 songs more or less represent your music collection? more or less

junior year's over, i guess i'm a senior now. i'm barely sleeping again i'm super paranoid again my fucking moods are crazy again my lows are lower, my highs higher and i think its because of my relationship i'm not used to this i'm so scared of getting hurt or of hurting him but fuck it, theres nothing in the world that can make me leave him i've never known love like the love he gives me and i've never felt like this about anyone EVER before in my life we went to see a movie with some friends tonight we held hands in the darkened theater and i rested my head on his shoulder we stole kisses from each other when no one was looking i felt like it was our first date and i was in 6th grade again it was so nice we were supposed to have a sleepover tonight, but we couldn't he promised me one soon though i don't even think we'll have sex during it or even do anything sexual i wholeheartedly believe we'll just cuddle and hold each other until we fall asleep our relationship is so perfectly balanced -our sex life (though we haven't had sex yet, we've done everything else) is beyond exciting, and we're wildly attracted to each other -we act as though we're best friends, and have obscene amounts of fun together. we do the silliest, stupidest, craziest, most reckless and embarrassing things when we hang out -we're both very much in touch with our romantic sides. somewhere during the night we end up wrapped in each others arms, staring in to each others eyes, whispering "i love yous", and sharing sweet soft slow kisses everything is 100% comfortable i feel as though its not real its too fucking perfect, i always say but then he holds me or kisses me or makes me start hysterically laughing and i know its all real and hes real and im real and neither of us are going anywhere i like love, ive decided finally

i said a while ago that i would copy some of my old writing into this. i think i only put one piece in here. so, here's another. i found it in my freshman english writing portfolio. it had to be about a particular season, and the format was modeled after a passage from to kill a mockingbird: summer was what we waited for every year. the idea of it was what kept us sane throughout the school year. it was the perfect exclamation point on a 180 day long sentence. summer was our best season: it was driving to the beach almost everyday to feel that familiar, fulfilling burn of the sun on our backs and the salty air caressing our sun-reddened cheeks. it was waking up early with every intention of beating the crowds to where ever it was we were going, but never succeeding. it was making ridiculous plans to run away to california, but having even more fun on the playground of the pool club with an iPod and a perfect view of everything going on. it was the permanent scent of chlorine and salt water embedded in our hair and clothes. it was long nights of manhunt, barbecuing, and blasting old songs from a boom box. it was lazing on the hammock out back in the cool early evening, watching the sky change colors and day dreaming about the future - whether the future was 10 years, 10 weeks, or 10 minutes away. it was acting like little children and playing outside during one of the many thunderstorms. it was wearing a bathing suit everywhere we went, knowing we would eventually end up in someone's pool. it was the little things, like never having to wear sneakers and letting our tans take the place of our makeup. it was feeling the need to go out every day and stay out late every night. it was living off icepops and lemonade for 3 months. it was the feeling that we owned the world, and nothing could hold us back. but, above all things, summer was about the memories.

this needs to stop. first song: friendship by the ambush second song: sundrenched world by joshua radin third song: fall apart by 1208 fourth song: challengers by the new pornographers fifth song: geek in the pink by jason mraz sixth song: high tide or no tide by evergreen terrace seventh song: runaway by cartel eighth song: delusional by saves the day ninth song: razorblades by story of the year tenth song: this wasn't in our plan by the early november who does song 1 remind you of? amber, more or less what part of your life does song 2 remind you of? last year if you could dedicate song 3 to anyone, who would it be? hm, no one right now really does song 4's lyrics mean anything to you personally? yeah, it reminds me a lot of nick, and how we came to be why do you like song 5? its adorable and quirky and funny and cute. typical jason mraz. when did you first start listening to the artist of song 6? a few years ago. maybe 2 or 3? how many albums do you have from the artist of song 7? just this one how are songs 8 and 9 similar? somewhat same genre? idk, they're really not that similar what's song 10's meaning? last chances and desperation which song out of the 10 is your favorite? this wasn't in our plan, sundrenched world, or high tide or no tide which song out of the 10 is your least favorite? runaway which song means the most to you? why? challengers, it reminds me of nick. or high tide or no tide and sundrenched world, it reminds me of everyone else. would you dedicate any of these to your love/crush? yes, challengers. would you dedicate any of theses to your enemy? maybe friendship. but that's not quite pissed off or biting enough. do these 10 songs more or less represent your music collection? yeah, basically space jam just came on tv i'm content

i have nothing of importance to say lately. sarah smokes too much now, and it makes me sad. and worried. me and nick are best friends. its adorable. i need summer, i'm slacking in school so much. i want to start writing again. i miss feeling talented. i feel the words inside me, i just don't know where to put them. i never sleep anymore. i can't. i'm back to feeling as though i'll miss something if i do. it frustrates me so much. i'm still very sad that ligeia broke up. god, i'm trying too hard to have something to say. i'm doing this survey for the 1200th time. song #1: the no seatbelt song by brand new your favorite lyric from this song: omg, the entire song