People can't reply to your posts. That should be coming in the future though. Hope that helps.

I just wanted to watch television.. Nothing was on. I wanted to watch one of those sappy-funny sitcoms. Like Still Standing or Grounded for Life. Or eve one of those shitty ABC Family films. So I'm watching this designer lady named like Rachel Zoe or something. I like her bitchy assistant. =] I don't want television often, but when I do I usually watch shit television. I started writing this over an hour ago. Haha. I got caught up in talking to my mummy before she shipped off for work. Wednesday we're going to get our hair done. It's not that I love to get my hair done, and that I like that sort of thing. I just like doing things like that with my mom, since we don't have a great deal in common. We'll probably go out to lunch together too. I spent the weekend with Dar. We were only suppose to spend Saturday together, but Bren blew him off on Friday (again) He was just going to change plans for Halloween and go with Bren, which kind of irked me. Then Bren blew him off, and I asked if we could just go together, since we had had these plans for like 2 months. I'm buying a costume, it's our favorite holiday, I want to spend it with Dar. So, I finally spoke up (after keeping it all in for two days) and he says, 'I'll check with Bren' and I was just kind of awe struck. Why does he have to 'check' with Bren. Bren's blown him off twice now. So I said that, and I think it kind of clicked in his mind. He's like me =\ he let's people screw him over. He asked why I hadn't spoken up, but I just didn't want to sound like a controlling bitch. It wasn't that I didn't want him to hang out with Bren, just not on that particular holiday.. Anyway, it all worked out for the best. Bren ended up calling him on Saturday evening asking if Dar could go see his band, and that Bren would pick him and me up and everything. Dar said no, I could tell he was kind of pissed off at Bren. Which he had every right to be, Bren still hasn't even told him why he ditched. I have an A in my Informal Algebra II class! I'm proud, even if it is a slower class. I'm also pulling an A in my advanced English II. Hm, I thought I had more to write about, but I guess not. I think I'm going to go channel surf and eat left over chinese (yum yum) Take care. Quote of the Day: ~"The only difference between Hitler and Bush is that Hitler was elected."~ -- Kurt Vonnegut PS- The Perks of being a Wallflower is on its way for me! I can't wait =]

I just got done fighting over a bowl of rice with my kitten at my kitchen table. She's such a rascal/porker. Dar calls her stomach 'the tank' because she's getting rather chunky. haha. I don't really have much to talk about this afternoon. I've been listening to Playradioplay! Dar and I listened to boats of music last night. He's kind of into MCR and the guitarist, Frank Iero has this band called Leathermouth. I honestly thought it would be complete shit, but it's really good. It's a post-hardcore band, and listening to it you would never guess the lead man is in my chem. Last night We were lying on my bed and my lap top was on the end of it and Dar was picking music. The song we were listening to (By Starlight- Smashing Pumpkins (lovely song)) was over, and he picks a new one. At first I didn't recognize it, but then I realized it was Sunny Day Real Estate. He apparently is fond of them now that I've shown them to him. Which is just stellar. Well, PrP! is over, and now it's on to The Postal Service, which frankly, I haven't listened to in ages. So, the other day Camden showed me a band, which had a bunch of other bands on it's page. I'm so happy! New music is always fun. Astrophel & Stella were the band, and then from their page morning..., Lights Above Us, and Arrows in Her were found. I also stumbled upon this guy's project Lightspeed Champion. It's ace! Lightspeed Champion sounds like something that could definitely be trendy, but it's so cool. It's kind of pop-punky, and the guy is so cool (well, his blog is anyway) (haha I thought my phone was going off because the song playing is my ringtone...lol) I've realized Dar is a bit like Holden Caulfield, only doesn't curse so much, and isn't so extremely down all the time. I may go over the similarities another day. Anyway, I've also found I'm a bit like Holden. I think about phonies a lot. For instance, my driving instructor's husband(my old principal) is a total phony. They were just wed a few months ago, and I was just thinking of what kind of husband he would make, and how he would act on a honey moon. What a phony.. Oh! Frank also used to be in this band Pencey Prep, where he just sings instead of screaming, it kind of sucks, but the name is awesome. Dar showed it to me and I got rather excited then had to explain the meaning of the name to him. =P Well, I need to read postsecret. Allchokedup & easy-lucky-free - good luck with the boyfriend troubles. Quote of the Day: ~“I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.”~ --Stephen Wright (this is me exactly)

Written eaerlier today: I came to the realization today that this is the point in my life when childhood is completly gone. I'm sitting in Study Hall as I write this in my agenda, and it seemed to have suddenly hit me. I've always felt older that my age group, and took pride in being more mature. Yet, at the same time I clung to my past as if it were the only thing I had. I've finally let go of the past, and I mean it when I say it. I began to realize it last night as I talked to Dar on the phone. However, I think what pushed me to the realization is all this talk of the festival. You see, they got rid of the tallest, fastest ride (the only one most kids my age ride) and everyone is rather pissed about it. As they spoke in angry voices of the news, I thought of the ride. I thought of when I rode it, and I realized I'm past that. And not because I'm too cool for it or anything, but just because it seems kind of silly. As they spoke I realized the fair itself was no longer important to me. I'm looking towards the future a lot, but not in that longing way that I used to. Now, I'm preparing in a positive way for it. I'm trying in my classes for once, and I'm doing extremely well. I know a lot of things will change before I reach adulthood, but I'm ready. I feel in these past few months I have grown so much, and I know I still have plenty of room to grow and improve. I know I will always be growing and improving, but I'm happy with who I am, and I am in life. I no longer want to cling to my past as a security blanket. I'm happy now. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- I wrote a story yesterday afternoon. It was the first story I've completed in months (not counting ones for school). Not only that, but it was the first non-murder/death story I've ever completed. Also, I found a good amount of new music, check out Astrophel and Stella if you have time. They're ace. They kind of sound like Brand New to me. Quote of the Day: ~"The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing."~ --Walt Disney I need to do my Chem. gr.

It is raining out, but it's not the kind of rain that makes you want to sit outside and take it all in. It's more of the kind that makes you want to shut the curtains and snuggles into a mountain of blankets and just does all day to the sound of raindrops on your window. So, I'm having to wear gloves because my hands are so cold that the joints of my fingers actually ache. However, I can't type or use the mouse (I have a laptop) with the gloves, so I cut holes in the very tips of them so my finger tips barely show. They look silly and it kind of feels like I have bear paws as I'm typing this, but I'm home alone, so oh well. Yesterday and the day before I spent with Dar. We went to his house Friday and then he came over Saturday. It was lovely as always. On Saturday I accidentally left a mark on his neck.. apparently he bruises really easily, I feel awful. I think hickies are trashy, and I'm just wondering what his parents will think. :S I had him watch Donnie Darko yesterday. He didn't really get it until I explained it to him. Which, it is a confusing movie after all. He got most of it though, I think the ending just went a little quick for him to grasp it. He said he liked it though, which is a huge plus. [my hands are warming a little, hurrah!] So, I'm listening to Nick, and I kind of thought it wouldn't be as nice because it's all rainy an whatnot, but it's still grand. I really love the song 'Time Has Told Me' When I first got on the site, Easy-Lucky-Free's journal was up, which I usually read on Sunday's, so I read it. Then as I read that, AllChokedUp's journal was on, which I also read. So I read two of my favorite journal's in a row, it was kind of nice. So I basically just want to drone on about Dar some more, but I probably shouldn't. I may some other time. Anyway, I'm off to read Post Secret. [there's a storm coming] Quote of the Day: "Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage." --Lao Tzu Note to self: I need some of the gloves that have the fingers cut off already, but have the mitten-flap to put over them.

Sunday Afternoon Music: Belle & Sebastian It's not yet afternoon, but that's who I'll be listening to once it is. It's 9:44am and to me afternoon begins around 11. I think I'm going to watch Garden State in a bit. I really love that movie, so does Dar, we quote it a lot. We're both a little crazy, and it's okay; I wouldn't have it any other way. Yesterday I talked to Camden of happiness, and how I didn't know what makes me happy. Then that very day I spent it with Dar, and while I didn't have that excited happiness (like when you get a new cd or necklace) I realized just looking at him that if life when on like this forever, then I would be content. I always seem to be looking for the wrong thing. I was searching for that excited-happy, but I was looking for it to be permanent. I know now that is not a permanent emotion, and the happiness I felt last night was much more deep than that. I'm saving up to get my Alice in Wonderland costume for Halloween. I'm terribly excited for it. Not just the costume but Halloween altogether. Sean is going to dress up like a girl. He came up to me on Thursday and says, 'Kat, I need to ask you something' I say okay, and he says 'well, you dress pretty nicely and for Halloween I want to be a chick, so could I borrow some of your clothes, I think we're about the same size' I agreed and then laughed imagining Sean in my clothes. It should be great fun, that Holiday always is. Autumn is here. I am so happy, autumn is beautiful I love it. So, I'm thinking I'm going to try and write every Sunday morning/arvo. I have blue curtains, so I open up the blind and let the curtain hang down so there's a blue light in my room, I like it that way, in the morning at least. I also like to read journal's on Sunday mornings, and I like to read the new post secret's. I like to plan ahead on Sunday's too, so there's no worry. This afternoon, I'm going to eat a cup of noodles, have a bottles of water, listen to Belle & Sebastian, and surf ebay to find weird things I plan to buy eventually. I think Sunday has become my favorite day of the week. Quote of the Day: "Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you." -- Lao Tzu

I miss arkansas, but I know already that next summer won't be the same. There's been a lot of things that have happened since I left. And it seems just about everyone but Gur has fallen. Fro is now dating Amy..which is bad, because Amy was dating Dougie and Fro didn't even wait a week to start dating her. Which is a major no-no. It's BS, Dougie is a great guy, and doesn't deserve that at all. Fro's done this to several other people too. (stealing girlfriends) Then there's Rus and Lil. Rus is crazy in love with Lil, and Lil doesn't love him back. Everyone thinks he just wants in her pants, but he came out and told Lil he loved her. Then bought her a pair of real nice shoes with money he doesn't have and told her to lie to the House and say her mom got them for her. TJ and my sister have had a fall out because of my sister's new boyfriend. TJ feels abandoned, but Tas can't help it really. Her new boyfriend is like her drinkin' buddy, and TJ isn't much of a drinker. Plus, so much drama is happening Tas is just trying to stay to the side lines, and TJ doesn't understand. Plus, I'm about 85% TJ loves my sister more than she could ever know, but don't tell her that. :x Now, the electricity has been shut off at the House, and everyone has had to fend for themselves elsewhere. I knew it would happen, I just didn't want to think about it. My sister already said she doubts we'll spend as much time there as we did. Which honestly...is okay with me.. Fro's real colors came out, and he to me is a just another asshole Virgo. Rus, as much as I love the guy, will be impossible to look at the same. Lil, I never connected that much with anyway. TJ, my swimming buddy, will visit me I know. So really, I just want to see Gur, cause he's simple and wonderful. Of course I'll miss the House...but I'm embracing changes in my life, and this is just another one. I have my memories there, and even if I did go back and everything was peachy, it will still be different. Only in a much worse sort of way..it would be an awkward thick-aired way, where I no longer know what to do, cause I know whats gone on. I'll see them all again someday, just not the way it was. Plus, I think I'm okay with changes, and I'm okay with not going back. I don't have the need to run in the past. I'm happy with where my life is. I'm comfortable, I know who I am and where I stand, and most importantly; I'm happy. I'm actually very happy with where my life is right this moment. I just cut my hair the way I've longed for, I go to shows every weekend, I get my school work done, I have a wonderful beau, and just the overall feel of my life is good. Next summer I won't be there as long anyway. My mom will be going along. I hope she doesn't impose on Tas and I. Also, I've been thinking about drugs. I promised Dar I wouldn't do any, and I also promised Kins... Kins is back in my life again. It's nice. It's nice to have his advice and company again, but I don't feel like I need it. It's a comfortable sort of friendship. I added him, and we've talked a few times since. It's nice really, he's happy, I'm happy, we share our moments and advice, it's wonderful. I doubt anyone even remembers him..or has read my journal that long =P oh well. Quote of the Day: ~“Memory is the diary that we all carry about with us”~ --Oscar Wilde