ever since i can remember i wanted to be famous. to be remembered for something i did. at first i wanted to be a singer, actress or even a model. but then i realized that to be famous you don't have to be on television. but then again there's a saying that is very true. "good girls don't make history" and well i can basically say i'm a good girl. i'm not going around telling people what i think about politics, abortion, gay marriage or anything of that sort. i'm not the girl that you come to for advice... becuase all i'm really good at is listening. i have my moments though. i bust out with some random quote or saying i've heard before that i know is very much true. and well sometimes people thank me for that. just as well as they thank me for being me. a quiet girl who listens when their world is falling apart. i don't mind. i like to be the shoulder people cry on. but then again who is there for me. the last time i cried i was next to the most wonderful man in the world. he's been everything to me in the past two months. i can't say i love him... but i care for him. he says he loves me... but who am i to know if he's telling the truth or whether his actions towards me don't hide another intention. he says i'm not a whore. he says i'm beautiful. he says i'm the girl he wants to spend the rest of his life with. but yet we've only been together for three months. how are we to know that's what truly is what our hearts want? i love being around him. i love the way he makes me feel. i love the way he makes me smile. i love the way he makes the tears go away. but he doesn't know that the only thing that can make the pain go away. that the only thing that can make the tears dry up... is turning up the volume to radio. and just being there with me... holding me. as i breakdown and slowly began to recover without much doubt. even though his words don't fall behind with such experience. his words are all i really need and a good song to make things better. even when they really aren't. music makes the world go round. and without it i'd be nothing. it's my way of forgetting all my troubles all my sadnesss and this loneliness and emptiness i get when i shouldn't be having it. funny how i can write so much about anything... but when it comes to writing my stupid essay & my stupid reasearch paper i get writers block. how sad! hopefully this has made things clearer to me... so i can make my way back to thinking about the constitution and the federalists and the anti-federalists. =]