today i : ▪woke up at 11.00 ▪layed in bed and texted J for an hour (wow i love my grammar) ▪got up and had lunch ▪played piano for awhile ▪went on facebook for a few minutes.. ▪washed the van ▪went for a quick swim ▪made a smoothie ♥ ▪played some more piano (clearly i need a life) ▪and now i'm here. isn't that exciting? haha this is how i spend my day off. doing nothing and getting fat. i love it. sooo.. as of last night.. myself and J (the guy i have been talking about below) are "together". now, together is not the same thing as dating or being a couple for all those who do not know. apparently, together ensures your feelings for one another, and that other people are not in the picture. so there is some level of commitment but it's not like we're dating.. so yeah. that's my big news haha.. he makes me happy and that's all i can ask of him right now. however.. we have been good friends for 3 years.. we hung out a lot last summer.. and my parents don't really agree with our "friendship". they think he is a bad influence on me and they really dont like the thought of us talking or hanging out. so i guess telling them that we are "together" now probably isn't the greatest idea huh? but we'll work around them. i'm sneaky ;) haha, anyways, that's really all i have to write.. i'll probably think of something as soon as i press submit.. i'll just write another entry. haha. peace + love - L

this is my second entry for the day.. i am going to continue my list of pet peeves.. slash things that annoy me. (there may be duplicates from the list below) ▪in itunes when the title and artist is screwed up. ▪hunger ▪cliffhangers in books ▪2/4 timing ▪my job ▪spoons ▪ketchup ▪when peoples toes hang out over their sandles. ▪when people say "my bad" ▪when people label themselves.. aka wearing a black shirt with "PUNK" written across the chest. who does that? ▪duplicate text messages ▪people who text slowly ▪people who send two texts to answer one. ▪the volume of the tv right now. i can't hear myself think. ▪slow walkers. ▪when the telephone rings. ▪school ▪untrustworthy people.. i probably shouldn't be talking. ▪how i always screw things up when they're going good. ▪how i may have hooked up with a horrible guy who used me. ▪scratches on my phone. ▪when i'm thirsty and there's nothing to drink. ▪how i have nothing better to do then sit here and list things i dislike.. wow i really need a life. - L

sooo.. this is entry numero dos.. very exciting. i never really wrote for awhile.. probably because my internet has been deathly slow these last few days. but clearly that's just an excuse for my incompetence. haha. anyways, i started a new job yesterday. it's at a department store downtown (and by downTOWN, i mean downVILLAGE).. and no body shops there so i mostly stand there all day. its awesome.. minus the awesome. so.. i'm frustrated with myself. in more ways then one. i'm kinda getting "close" with a friend of mine.. and its confusing.. because i have no clue where we stand.. and i dont know how he feels.. he tells me he loves that i'm in his life and all.. but i dont know if he means it in a friendly way or what.. wow my problems are so.. dumb. i can't help it though. and i always think like.. how can i be down in the dumps when i know there are people with problems ten times bigger and harder than mine. i dislike myself for it. but i think we all do it.. i think anyways.. back to the guy. one of my best friends lost her virginity to him.. but now doesn't want anything to do with it. but i still find it awkward if she sees me with him or whatever.. because she is a close friend. and i know everything she's gone through and done with him.. sometimes i wish i never knew.. oh well.. i guess that's my fault for being a nosey friend. i always find myself messing up. especially with this guy. he always wants to hang out. and i would love to hang out with him. but my parents really dont like him and i kinda don't blame them.. clearly i choose the wrong guys to date. but yeah.. so i'm always nervous about asking to hang out with him because i know they'll say no.. and it seems that there's no point in even doing it. then i feel bad because i let him down.. and yeah. yuck. i hate it. i feel like i need to prove that i want to be around him before anything happens in the first place.. if that makes sense.. and i've told him this. he says there is no need for me to prove anything. but it's really not for him. it's for myself. if i can stand up to my parents, it will show me that i really care about him. man i sound like a dummy haha. i love me. this is a long journal i think. i've been typing for awhile. but not a long while because i am a fast typer. :) haha.. so i'm listening to the sunscreen song.. its really good.. technically not a song.. just a speech put to music. but yeah, i listen to it when i'm feeling negative about my future.. which is quite often.. it scares me that i have no clue what i'm doing when i grow up. and i'm going into grade 11 in the fall. it upsets me that i realize that i have to figure it out, but i don't. i can't. i dont know how and truthfully, i'd rather not think about it. i'd rather live my life one day at a time, to the fullest. but i think i've failed that wish so far. my life isn't full. i'm not saying its empty. but i think there's a lot of room for improvement. and i do not say this to blame anyone but myself. i take the blame for it completely... i really dont know what i'm talking about.. haha this happens often. anywayssss, i'm going to conclude this short novel. haha :) - L

So I'm brand new to this.. I don't know how addicting it is. But we shall find out. I wrote an English exam today.. Or I should actually say 9 pages of an English exam. Wow it was long. It was mostly focusing on Romeo and Juliet though, so that was good. Since I'm an expert haha.. Except not. Anyways, I think I did pretty good. Now all I have left to write is Math on Thursday which should be alright. I really don't know if anyone will read this.. I don't want this all going out to cyberspace to never be read again. That would be sad. :( Yeah.. So my ex-boyfriend who I dated for a year will not leave me alone. And now he's got his best friend working for him too. They're both trying to convince me to go back to him.. They don't realize it's never going to happen. Sorry! But yeah, it's really starting to bug me. Really.. Oh look - I'm the newest user! That's pretty cool. :) Haha.. Man, this is dumb. I'm listening to some Michelle Branch.. Don't ask why. Now I'm listening to Telfer. It's a band from rural New Brunswick - they're pretty awesome and they all graduated from my high school. So they're local boys! Yess.. I'm just rambling here.. But I'm pretty sure that's what journals are for. School's almost over! *happy dance* haha.. Yay for summer. Okay, I should end this. No one is reading it anyway. Okay I'm not going to end it. I'm going to make a list of my pet peeves. `Slow walkers. `When the songs on iTunes don't have the artist in the artist spot and the name in the name spot. `People who use other people for skin. `Texting duplicates. `People who take forever to respond to a text message. `How I couldn't keep a secret if my life depended on it. `Exams That's all I can think of that seems important for now. But that is not all. Lots of things annoy me.. Like kazillions of things. Haha :) - L