After re-reading my past entries like I did in last post I never really saw that I was totally stupid! All the internet guys (and yes my friend Jonathan was an internet one too) were just playing me in one way or another whether it was intentional or not....they played me! They played my heart and my feelings and it hurt to know that I would never ever see them....but when you finally realize that you have to laugh(and mind you I realized that for a long time now). But aside from the funny I have to talk about Augie...It will be a year in 2 days!!!!! And I have never felt so happy!! I know that true happiness is when you can see the persosn, feel their skin against your own, kiss them everytime you see them and know that they are yours and not just a blank screen. I love the feeling I get when I see his face or feel his love behind each kiss. Its amazing. God! I miss him just thinking about all that, haha. But I know that I will see him soon :) so till next time enjoy my blurb I guess.... LOVESSSSS Lyss :D

So I was reading over my past entries and decided to laugh at them rather than cry since they are of the old me. I look back with a smirk since I have grown over the past 6 or so months since the days of Louie, Will, Chris(1 and 2..lol) and even Mark....these boys weren't real to me since they were never in front of my face. If you haven't guessed, they were all from the internet...classic huh? Well then I guess you are wondering about Augie then, well I can assure you that Augie is real deal. Augie is everything I can ever want...he is sweet, kind, caring, strong, handsome, amazing, wonderful, sexy, tough, sensitive, loving, charming, intellegent, adorable, and more. We met in person in September and since then I have known the true meaning of love. To say I love him is an understatment to how I feel for this man. I want everyone to know that I have found my soulmate. And for those who say there isn't anyone out there for you, you are wrong...when you least expect it, someone will open your heart to a love that will last a lifetime. Augie I love you

I am offically in love with Augie and have been for over 3 months now...everyday I am with him is amazing. He makes me feel whole and no one else can compare to everything he is. He has these beautiful hazel green tint eyes that I find myself melting in everytime he looks at me. I can get enough of his strong warm arms that seem to hold me CLOSE to his heart. His kisses make me fall in love with him all over again. And our talks make me smile for hours. I love him with my whole heart and he is my one true soulmate. I love you Augie and I promise I always will.

So here it is...over a month and I can tell you each day i spend with Augie is truley wonderful. We share so much and its never boring or dull. If this is what true love feels like it is simply wonderful. Its like a nice warm comfortable sweater you wear when the cold hits you. I truely love my Augie and simpley cannot ask for more :)

So I am offically in love with a great guy. I met him at school about 2 weeks ago and I can tell you I never ever felt like this before. I am so happy its amazing:) Finally someone I can feel my most comfortable with and let all my secrets out. Augie I love you so much and I always will...thank you for everything you do for me, you truly are amazing :)

So its been a few weeks now....or less than...I lost count. But aside from that I have new reason to smile. Its in the form of Jonathan. A great friend who understands me for who I am. Its like without wanting something, it comes to you in a different way. And that's just what I needed. So thank you Jonathan, for everything. You truly are amazing.

The Winner Takes It All I don't wanna talk About the things we've gone through Though it's hurting me Now it's history I've played all my cards And that's what you've done too Nothing more to say No more ace to play The winner takes it all The loser standing small Beside the victory That's her destiny I was in your arms Thinking I belonged there I figured it made sense Building me a fence Building me a home Thinking I'd be strong there But I was a fool Playing by the rules The gods may throw a dice Their minds as cold as ice And someone way down here Loses someone dear The winner takes it all The loser has to fall It's simple and it's plain Why should I complain. But tell me does she kiss Like I used to kiss you? Does it feel the same When she calls your name? Somewhere deep inside You must know I miss you But what can I say Rules must be obeyed The judges will decide The likes of me abide Spectators of the show Always staying low The game is on again A lover or a friend A big thing or a small The winner takes it all I don't wanna talk If it makes you feel sad And I understand You've come to shake my hand I apologize If it makes you feel bad Seeing me so tense No self-confidence But you see The winner takes it all The winner takes it all... ~ABBA So my real true happiness is gone because the distance has killed him and so he decided to end it. I understood the best I could...

I sit and wonder sometimes if my life is a dream. I have been nothing but really happy for weeks now and I find it so odd because usually I am never so happy. Its a new feeling for me to be this happy. Maybe its because things are finally coming together or maybe its because there isn't anyone ruining my mood. Well whatever the case I am just really happy and I cannot questionit because I know why I am happy.....It is because I am making myself happy. And of course being with Chris these last few weeks has made me even more so...so for anyone out there I want to share my happiness with you....everyone take a little because i am sure I have enough for this whole world. Enjoy and be Happy peace and love ~Lyss :)

Well I am not jealous.....I have no reason to be but Will is....I find it very humerous. He called me a whore!!!! WHAT THE FUCK!?!?! I am not a whore....I don't even sleep around....I don't fuck my friend for the hell of it...*cough*cough* Well anyways its new to me that Will would be so damned jealous of Chris and I. "He is just jealous I beat him to the punch..." that was so cute coming from Chris' mouth :) Anyways if you must know Chris wanted to kill Will when I told him that he called me a whore...but made me feel better when he said "I don't love whores...Alyssa*...I love you" :) HE LOVES ME!.....YES HE LOVES ME, BITCHES! *that is my real name....just a side note anyways I am just really happy. It feels good to be truely happy and at ease. so yeah I think thats it for now Peace and love ~Lyss :):):):):)

Yeah that was my answer when Chris said "what would you say if I asked you to be in a relationship with me?" Classic huh? well that was the night before last...and he asked me and now I am in a relationship with him.....oh i forgot to mention I broke Louie's heart...I didn't want to break it but I had too, I needed to be without him. So now I am with Chris....and it feels soooooooooo surreal....like I cannot stop smiling. Is this what real happiness is? I think so....I truley am so happy that I need to scream it out. And finally I am relaxed. I think my life rocks!!! ~Lyss :):):):):)