It's been over 7 months since I last blogged here. I almost forgot about all of my blogs. (There's two of them.. One on Blogger, one here.) I'll start talking about the things that are bothering me at the moment. Here it goes. People get so depressing sometimes. Talking about their problems and the things they hate about their lives. I can get so sick of it all, from time to time. Do you know the feeling? Just wanting to get away from their pointless words? But I consider myself to be a good friend. Or at least I try to be. I'll listen, and talk back. One day I might need a friend too, you know? Oh well.. Back to what happenend yesterday. My parents own a restaurant. Not a fancy one. Just a restaurant. It's doing okay.. Better than most of those 'elite' things.. So I'm proud of my dad. Really. Especially for what he did.. There was a woman. (there's always 'a' woman, i know.. But this one forgot to chew!) Apparantly she started to turn blue! My dad helped with the CPR. She had a pulse when the ambulance arrived. And to think I just received my first aid-diploma a couple of weeks ago. I wasn't even there! Would I've been able to help out? Could i have saved her.? They say she won't make it. Her brain didn't get any oxigen for a couple of minutes. It's so sad! I wasn't even there. But still.. It's so weird. Her daughter was with her. What would be going through her head right now?

I am seeing in me now the things you swore you saw yourself.. Oh well, things just might work out for me.. Remember the 'best friend' i missed so much? Got over that now.. She thought it necessary to ignore me completely today.. And that was AFTER sending me a really crappy text message.. Ofcourse I'll give back your books, darling.. What did you think of me? Djeez!

Why can't anyone ever talk about the good things in life here? They're all just telling depressing stories and complaining about what went wrong today... It's retorical, since I'm about to start myself. I lost my best friend. Her name's Athina. "We" was everything I had, for over two years. And I lost one of the things most precious to me.. I lost our friendship. And I thought it would get better.. But it didn't. It's only getting worse. Lately all the important things in my life seem to fade away. Oh well, guess it's my fault anyway..

Why can't he just move on? Let go of me. Because i don't know if i can stand it, if it continues like this.. I know it wasn't anything more than a one night stand for him, so why is he always asking me why it went like this? As if I've got the answers now? He hurt me more than he could possibly imagine, and still.. He asks me what's going on.. After all this time.. I still miss him. And I'm just trying to find out what I did wrong.. Believe me. It's f.ing hard this way!

Just came back in. Put on a sweater and went in the garden with my ipod. About halfway through Konstantine, I started wondering.. Would he come to my funeral, one day? [Background info: I'm talking about Olivier, the guy i've been crazy about for five months now.. We had 'a thing', it was nice, really. Until he decided to go back to his ex. Apparantly he still loved her, even though he told me the opposite.. Auwch. I'm still putting my heart back together after that one.. :)] so.. Would he still care enough to come over if I'd die? Or am i simply one of his memories right now? I wish he'd come over one last time. Just to say goodbye. I know he won't. He's got his new girl now (the ex he chose over me dumped him two weeks after that).. I still miss him. If loving someone is a good thing, then why does it always hurt this bad?

It's been a long time since I posted here. Got really addicted to Songmeanings lately. Searching the lyrics of every song I hear. Weird? Naah. Reading other people's Journal had kept me busy for the last hour and a half. Boredude. Poor guy. I don't know where he's from, or what's happend to him, all I know is what he posted here. Would anyone spend time reading this? And would they even care? I went to London with school, thursday & friday. It wasn't as good as I'd expected it to be. *sigh* I went there, already really stressed about the situation between me and my 'best' friend, I was really angry with him and he didn't even seem to care. Great. .When I got there, he just acted asif nothing happened. Even greater. Why is it so hard for him to admit Karen's his everything now. It would make things a lot easier for me. I hate her. She hates me. He loves her. He likes me. She loves him. I like him. Well, I guess it's simple. Go on, be happy together. And PLEASE stop the stickyness! Get a room?! I liked Mme Tussaud's, though. And I did some excellent thinking in the Underground. On my way to be a real philosopher ;)

If you don't know what it is, you're probably not from belgium.. But hey, that doesn't matter, now does it? It stands for Cours de Langues Intensif à Paris (which is, by the way, french..) I just went to Braives for a week, to take Formation-classes with 10 other girls, all quite eager to become Monitrice. (don't know if it's the same word in english, but anyhow, the people who go along on camps and guide the children there.. It was really the most fun I had in 2007 (so far..)) But, as it happens, all good things come to an end. I'll miss you guys.. All of you. From Niels to Tomas, hell, I'll even miss Larissa.. I already do.

I'd like my english to be better, but hey, whatever.. I guess it could always be just that little bit worse. The thing is, I probably won't be posting here as much as on my blog [www.saltedkiss.blogspot.com], but since one of my regular readers causes me so much heartache lately.. I suppose it's become quite impossible for me to write about it there.. I used to love having a diary, but somehow I ended up spilling it all on the net.. Here it goes. I love my best friend. In a non-romantic way. And for a while it was just him and me against the world. As if there'd never be a Karen in his life. That turned out a bit different, though. And I can't help but be enormously sad about it. It feels like losing him, to know he'd rather spend time with the girl that had allready cheated on him, in stead of spending it with me. I don't think of myself as 'better', but I know I'd do everything for him.. And she simply wouldn't.