there are no more words, really. they've all gone. they all gave up on me when he did. he'd rather be miserable on his own. i couldn't help him because he never wanted my help to begin with. "I hope you have a wonderful life and forget me sooner, rather than later." that's probably the last thing he's ever going to say to me. it's just so contradictory to everything else he's ever said. i don't know how i'm going to move on, or forward, or at all. he lied the entire time, and i believed the entire time. i really thought i was stronger than this, but i'm not. love is a trap for fools, and i just happen to be the biggest one. there are no words. these are merely groupings of letters that don't matter anymore. i went to get help today. they gave me pills and a number to call, and then sent me home. i don't know how much longer i'll be around, to be honest. i never had all that much and now whatever i did have has been taken away. these just aren't words because he took them all away when he left. and he said that he doesn't want me to ever bother asking for them back. i just don't have anything left.