well, at long long last, sumthin decent happened, my life still sux hard, but at least there is 1 thing worth gettin up in da morning for, sum ppl from my old high skool got in contact wit me and we gettin da band we had bak then, bak on da tracks. We're called El Zilcho, an inhouse joke of ours :)

well its absolutely offical, my life sux. Everything has fallen apart this week and i dont know how im gunna pick up da pieces. After my best bud passed away, stuff just fell to pieces between the rest of his/my friends. They try to pin da blame on me. They ring me in da middle of da nite and give me a spray and do other stuff to me to play with my fragile mind, ive really had enough off it, but i dont know wat to do. It hurts losing ur friends in one hit as now i cant do anything that i enjoy. Music is my refuge. I can crawl into the space between the notes and curl my back to loneliness. I wonder how long this can last???

Im having perhaps one of the worst weeks of my life, my best friend died in my house as i watched powerless which is hurting so so much rite now. He was da only person who had da time of day for me and helped me thru the hard times of the past few months. Its things like this that make sum1 wanna scream out at da world and ask y. Now im all alone, wishing for sumthin 2 change, but feeling so powerless. I want to give up and throw it all away but part of me is still hanging on so hard. Watching an event like i did this week really puts everything in perspective, that nothing really matters in the end.