Why is it that this year is so suddenly crappy. Last year my friends acctually liked me and talked to me. I spent my weekends with actual human beings, I was destined for the honour roll, even though it didn't matter back then, and my stupid back was technically straight. Now they're talking about surgery for that stupid, bloody condition that i will not name. stupid false hopes. Hmmmm... taht reminds me of that song... I forget what they call it and who sings it but i know that it goes "False hopes and expectations...something...something..Black Holes and Revelations" I"m just so tired of not being proper friend with them anymore. Stupid area band. and what i did was sure as hell not gossiping. I hate being such a spaz all of the time. I must get it from my dad.

This whole journal thing. I don't really know what to write about. well......My dad is a lot older than yours. And my mother is probably a lot deader than yours too. He's always angry. Always totally paranoid too. He's send all of his friends out the door. The only people he sees on a regular basis are his girlfriend (if you can call her that) and me. Me because I have to. His girlfriend because she had some sort of special talent.Some sort of saintly patience that keeps her sane. My worst fear is that some day. I will turn into him.