College is crazy, life is crazy. Everything is moving on. I miss Costa Rica. I miss the sounds and the smell and the way the humidity dangles from my skin and seeps through my pores and the showers that had no hot water. Nothing has ever felt so lovely. and sadly, I just miss Scott. I hate what he did, I hate that everything he has inside of him I believed in, I hate how he had me...or how he still has me. But most of all, I hate that i fell in love with him. I hate how I never even believed in love until I met him, and now that I've tasted it...I'm never going back. I am still so heartsick for him. He's in everything I do...he is everything I see. I hate myself for it. And yet, I'm in college. I see 28,000 students around me, and I can't imagine why I feel like this is the last place I should be. I think I need to go back to Costa Rica next semester...