It's late. My boys are in bed asleep. I'm tired. Good night.

Going to my cousin's house for the big dinner......

Funny how things were in my life just a bit more than a year ago. This last year has been such a trip. I met the most wonderful girl in the world then screwed it all up. Maybe I'll get another chance someday. Yesterday she told me she'd started dating another guy. It hurts so bad I can almost taste it. I don't know what's going to become of my life. I know it's never going to be the same. I know it's all going to be ok, but I don't know for sure if I believe it. This is pathetic. I'm going to do some work now.

I have the boys. They are up in my bed asleep. I'm going up to join them.

Here I sit listening to my MP3 collection. Looking up lyrics. Finally creating an account and adding my 2 cents worth. I'm sad and some of the music is helping me cry. I don't know what's going to become of my life. I know it's never going to be the same. I know it's all going to be ok, but I don't know for sure if I believe it. I just found out one of my "favorite lately" songs is about heroin. I still like it. The song I mean. This is pathetic. I'm going to bed. .