That title is the title of an Underoath song, and it says exactly what I'm NOT feeling. I'm not content with losing. I want, more than practically anything, for me to finally go to the movies with him and just see what happens. He's always busy. He never picks up his phone, or the line is busy. If they do pick up, he isn't home right then and he doesn't have a cell phone. He only picked up one time out of like 8. I think it's telling me something: that even if something does happen between us, it will be hard to keep in touch... eh. I don't feel like thinking about this. Chelsz.

I don't know what to do. I'm sitting at home, being a lazyass and having no plans. Tomorrow, I might, if I get up the courage, call the guy I like and ask him to the movies. But of course, I probably won't, because I'm a pansy. And I'm broke. Last time, I had my friend ask him to the movies and he said he was busy but he wanted to go. WTF does that mean? He's making it so hard to tell if he likes me or not. He's probably fucking with my brain, and it's working. More later.