I saw Against Me! on Friday night. I've never been happier in my life. Probably would've been happier if the feeling had stayed. It was pouring down with rain afterwards... We ran to the Hordern to find Ange's parents.. Then Steff told me that she was picking me up and taking me to a party.. So that was all good..but my sister didn't want to leave me standing in the rain by myself.. She waited with me then Steff got there and told me that we couldn't drop my sister home.. So now she hates me... Next morning I fix my phone which was destroyed by the rain and I call my sister.. And she tells me that I better have a lot of fun before I get home because I won't be having fun in a long time. So I sober up and call mother.. And she tells me that they were worried sick.. They thought I was coming home after the show. If my sister hadn't told them that it all wouuld've been fine. I thought I was staying at my sister's house afterwards anyway. But she thought I was getting a lift with Ange.. Anyway now I'm grounded for a month. Which is BULLSHIT! Holidays are in 2 weeks. My parents won't talk to me...neither will my sister...Steff hates me...and my parents won't let my friends talk to me. If I had reception in this hell hole maybe I could call them on my mobile... Anyway now I'm just being a whingey bitch. I've never been grounded before cause I always get away with things.. I guess I should've thought things through a little more. Against Me! fucking rocked though. I wish I'd been in the mosh. Although I could see my sister in there and she was getting destroyed. Looked like awesome fun! I've been listening to Against Me! since I got home on Saturday. I've barely left my room. Avoiding my parents is the best thing for my safety at the moment. Okay so thats my whinging done for today. Peace out!

"bec what was wrong yesterday? you said you were back to normal. i want to see you happy again. sorry but you're not good at hiding it.. it feels like we're not even friends anymore when its like this. i dont wanna just ditch you just cause i dont like you at the moment, i love you and i want things to go back to how they were and i wanna help you. but i dunno what the fuck to do." My closest friend said that to me a couple of minutes ago. I honestly don't know what to do either. The fact that she feels like we're not even friends anymore makes me so upset its not funny. At the moment all i can do is listen to pinback and watch the video for fortress. It makes me cry at the end for some reason. It was my sister's 21st birthday party on saturday. So there are heaps of balloons. I think I'll go pop a couple. "its my right to be a fucking baby sometimes" -owen