Hey people wats up..Im just listining to music again..Like usual. I Love to listin to music..I cant sing alot of the music that I Have been listining to but hey I can sing country good. Mom says its because I Have listined to country since I have lived with her..I Dont doubt it. She could drive me crazy listining to Country all the time..Thank god she goes to bed and I get the tv upstairs and Just listin and dance to music with carol. We have a jolly good time...0_o lol I'm on something huh? Its called prince albert..lol not really. Dude eddie got suspended today...and it sucks..I dont know for how long yet. He hasnt called me. I tried to call him like three times..Freaken Answering Machenes...So if he wants to talk to me and see how I feel than he will call. I didnt even getta kiss him good bye...:( and I dont like that..Yeah I have finally Faced the PDA and Its pretty kewl..I dont mind kissing him in school I mean hell I would kiss him everywhere in the school if there wasnt so many people..god damn preps rat ya out. Hell I almost got my phone took away for good..Samantha had it and mrs.wake took it from her! I was so upset over it and mrs.Bianchi got it back for me. Thank god. But then mrs.Bianchi is the same reason why eddie is suspended going on the fact that he didnt listin to her. He is always doing something to get in trouble..but oh well I still love him to much to care..But I hate it when he gets suspended. Its so lonely..and quite..but besides that I had a partially good day..Met the new girl, Kathryn..Love her hair top part is red and bottom part is black..Mom would kill over if I did that to my hair. She wont even let me go Black the closest thing I can get to black is Dark Brown..Hey do they make black cool aid..sean will help me color my hair that way..even if it aint perm. But who cares..I Would love to get my hair colored black..Ooooh Helena By MCR has just came on...That song is awesome. And Eddie still hasnt called...I know he will read this soon so HEY BABY I LOVE YOU! I had to get that out honey sorry. He never writes in his journal I checked it....But yet he gets on to read my journal...lol(I Laugh to much, huh?) And I type to much..Hey Eddie honey this one might take you a while to read..but dont worry I didnt use any big words ;) Mainly because if I cant say em then i really cant spell them but yeah like i know that many..I'm waaay to blonde for that shit...Dude if mom reads half the stuff I put in here I would be sent off for keeping stuff from her..Hah like I tell her anything anyways I cant tell her anything..ooh slipknot vermillion has come on now..right after Helena..hmm what a good combo...but back to mom she dont care what i have to say and i was really down today when i got home and i wouldnt talk to her because she never wants me to talk to her about my problems and then she gets all mad because i wouldnt tell her whats wrong and there aint no way in hell im telling her that the cell phone was almost took..that would be a BIG mistake,,,,well I gotta go figure out some other way to waste my life at the time since eddie aint gonna call it seems...and maybe Bob Sharp can play slice and Dice like he did earlier in the girls bathroom after i pratically put two and two together when i seen eddie in the front office and officer pence talking to the principal..hell he was gettin a free ride home from school. He did blow me a kiss though..and through my really let down smile I managed to blow one back..then bob gotta live a little now Im gonna have to get something bigger to cover up my wrists than the little braclets a was wearing and not let sara see it because then i might get the living hell beat outta me but yeah..I dont know if Eddie really cares..I have been cutten for along time..no one really knew though..not even Eddie hell after him telling the counselor i was gonna run away i didnt think i could tell him that i was cutten. Well sorry to bore you with my sad story and unhappy life(Only joy i have is Eddie) Cya Luvviez~Amie~

Hey Its like five thirty in the morning on a monday and Im up..in another thirty minutes I have to get ready for school..But hey the brightside about school is that I get to see Eddie..But next week we wont see each other at all because of spring Break..The break is good but not seeing Eddie is bad. Hey I type to much dont I? lol I cant help it..But then again I'm blonde and I can type faster than my stepdad and he can put a computer together..what does that tell you? Maaan I'm so bored and I miss Eddie so much but in about two hours and a half I get to see him. I Love him so much. But you all know that by now from preveous Entries. It says he is on right now but He aint I can tell from his name...He is asleep still. and will be for another thirty minutes or so. I love it when he holds me in his arms. It seems like we are the only two people around and thats all I care about when he holds me is him. Everything and everyone just wash away and are gone and I just wish it would stay that way but hey we are in school and Real Easily you can get in trouble for PDA Which Im workin to get over with. I dont think mom would kill me really if I got caught for doing PDA but hey I Dont really care what she thinks anymore. well its five forty five right now..So I gotta go and do something for another fifteen minutes before i bore you all to death;) Luvviez~Amie~

Yeah I know I done typed today but Im bored and I have to do something.And Right now I Look really weird..Im sitting at the computer desk with a pen in my mouth typping as fast as I can and trying to think about what might happen at church with me and eddie...No Body wants to know whats on my mind about that really..lol..Mom actually left me home alone for once..Im listining to Cradle of Filth-Nymphetamine Fix...Great song I love it...But I love Eddie More..He means everything to me..Just talking to him makes me happy..And guess what...My stepmom knows what we do when were in school..Carol dont tell her but some how she knows..thats how she knew I am always happy when Im around Eddie..You know I was starting to wonder how she knew that..Confusing almost huh? Sammie a friend of mine has a pic of me and Eddie Im trying to show her how to send it to me...She doesnt know how..She is blonde like me but hey I least I know how to send files..Do they make a How to send files for dummies book? If they do im gonna buy one for sammie...(Sammie if you read this I can explain) ;) Eddie is supposed to be calling me soon....I Cant wait...He is so sweet alot of times..Mom is getting used to him..But im not losing him again over her and what she wants..I love him to much and it hurts to give up something you love just for her..well eddie has called so i gotta go..bye luvviez~Amie~

This comin Thursday will be four weeks for me and Eddie. Next week will be a month that we have been going out. I mean we have known each other since third grade and he has failed two times..he failed third grade(Thats how I met him) and he failed fifth..Then I ended up failing 7th and we were in the same grade again. and I have been crushin on him since last year and he was too! But we never told anyone and no one ever knew. Not until half way through the 8th grade! When mom found out that I was going out with Eddie she was like aint that the boy you used to fight with all the time in third grade? I was like yes mom it is. Its amazing how when your young as in Elementry school you think boys have cooties and wont touch them..but then when you get in middle school its like all you can think about is boys and then there is always one boy in middle school that you will Love so much. Parent always call it puppylove but Me and Eddie know this aint puppy love because we know that we truly care for the other person more than words are capable of saying. I want so bad to give him something of mine(That I will not put in here) But Im to shy to tell him that even though I could tell him everything else about me its just really hard to just come out and say that. But he is figuiring out slowly what it is. I wonder what he will think. Before me and Eddie started going out and before i felt all those feelings for him I always said i was going to go find my real mom when I got out of high school. My aunt, keep in mind that she adopted me and my sister, believed i would too. But just the other day my real dad came over with my step mom and I love them both very much. and they started talking about what i was going to do after highschool and that came up and my step mom was like 'I dont think she will go because I can tell from the look in her eyes when she is with Eddie and when she talks to him that she loves him to much to leave him and run off to find her mom, and if she does really want to go then she will find some way to persaude him to go with her because she does love him." I was stunned by what she said because she had pratically knew that was what was going to happen. I was going to stay with him...I Love her more than ever now because she believes that middles school love isnt puppylove and that Me and Eddie can make it and now in a dark tunnel I was going through i finally found the light that i needed to help me keep going and not sit down and die. I Have hope now that I can make it with eddie. And I will. Dude i think i write to much lol..Well This helps to sit down and get it all off my chest at least on to here. I mean I really think that this relationship will work dispite what has happened in other relationships with my ex's but hey i dont even wanna bring up the x-file. Well I Gotta ditch luvviez~Amie~

The Pain It Hurts, and the thought of not seeing her kills me ever so slowly. Then the next day comes and the pain stops 'til 3 0'clock. Her lips are as soft as roses putting me to rest at her side. The Sky is filled with starts as we lie side by side. I love her so much at I dont want to leave her. Let me stay and lay at her side 'til the day I die, but I know they'll take her away from me . She's everything to me. My light dream and my reason to live. She's the best thing to happen to. She gives me the reason to love. This is what Eddie wrote for me! Aint It so Sweet! I love him SO Much

My Lifes Been Better In Some Areas...I have Eddie Back and Im Happy At School at Least. And then I Still Have A Couple Friends that are with me that talk still...Im Getting more...People are talkin to me. Im so happy these days..I used to just sit of by myself and not listin to anyone and ignore others. But now People talk to me again.....Im lovin life now