you're too fictional, doesnt make sense how you act and keep living with guilt. when people talk about your mistakes i respond with little thought and say "only if he knew." you might not know what that means yet but soon , when i've gone down my own road, you will find the stuff i left on my old floor so that one day when you figured it out, you will come find me and all that will be there will sit you junk that you trashed on me. you will be alone, you migt have your friends which are nothing like my friends because your friends arent even real. yeah, they are alive but just look how untrue they are to you. i think i was your only friend, the only defination of friend will be what i portray. someday when you're thirty you think back on that time when we talked about if we were thirty and single we would get married. you will try to find me, and when you do, you try to call but you cant get through. so you show up at my house, peek over my fence and see me with my husband laying together on our hammack and he will be singing to me softly in my ear, yeah softly. he won't be likfe you, no. you will live with your girlfriend and soon marry her. but you will never love her truly because you were and always will be in love with me. so when you see me in our local newspaper saying " if he only knew" talking about a teenage kid that accidently killed my child by drinking drunk, you will treature that forever, change your life and always remember that was the best advice anyone has ever given you.

" So hopefully I'll see you again, relive you again, be with you. So I'll dress my absolute best, to impress. I will get you your favorite candy maybe just a sweet, to take off your sour look on your pleasant face. I wll humor you and tell you that you were all I wanted yah and all i needed, but i would only be humoring myself. Oh so depressed. I'm not depressed. I have learned to suppress my feelings and it feels good. I will buy you dinner and I will watch your charm. I will drive you around by and by we will see what the world has to offer and then you will offer yourself, finally all the impressions and having impressed you will pay off, for one sweet kiss but I wont accept. No I'll take you home, tuck you in, and leave.... ... to never see you again."