I can really relate to the way my skateboard feels this morning... outside getting rained upon. This "woe is me" is a familiar feeling but i really wished i was beyond it. i didnt understand it when i was younger, i still dont really get it now but atleast i can recognize it... the mind to fall back and blind itself from the negative of the past, only look at individuals who were terrible in a positive light, why can i not look at this postive person and ignore his negatives? where is the light? "Our chief want in life is somebody who shall make us do what we can." Ralph Waldo Emerson i wish this "somebody" were a personification of the universe right now. i am TRYING to travel in the time of the universe. im trying to listen! this is life trying to kick start...yet...what? what is this? why do i feel like im doing everything wrong? why do i feel like im waking up every day waiting for something to start? i know i have to start things myself, how! i feel so held back held down right now. my imagination feels so limited and this is why no path lay before me. no soothsayer can direct someone with no path. where is the vision?!!?! feel like ive been trapped in a house of leaves Air is an overwhelming force to fire and i feel that fire is meant only to be with fire. is this a positive dream of times too long ago? I suppose ive erased the bad...? i think i was the bad. And that is still here doing the same things.

i didnt kno this thing had a journal =)