• funny how everything can change so fast. funny how one word can make you give up. funny how nothing really matters anymore. Sad to admit how weak i am. Sad to be as lovesick as i am. Sad simply to be who i am. Or mayb am i just bitter? that was all a sentence, but then it looked better this way.....wouldn't consider it a poem cuz i have no poetic talent. Anyway jonathan said no and mayb i don't see something cuz i'm not a guy, but if you love someone you wouldn't cheat on them. And i guess he's just not saying something mayb or i'm to blind to get it. And i accepted it, it's just like ok leave me alone i'm not wasting my time anymore. But then the idea that i could go out with someone else.....like alberto.....who wouldn't care. I guess that just made it all different like i don't want u to have sex with him blah blah blah. Did i ever say i would?? Did i ever really say i would even be asked by him??? And lastly is it even your business what i do with my life as of now....NO JONATHAN IT'S NOT. And then it all goes back to his cliche over used please don't be mad at me, if it really means that much to you then yeah i would do it. Now really that makes me feel wanted......i mean if that's really what you want ya know i could force myself to care mayb and like not cheat on you. Isn't that touching. but no, and do i want to force you to like me no, so do i want you to pretend to like me so i don't screw someone else no jonathan i'd prefer not, i'd rather u mind ur own problems and let me do what i want. I'm not going to pay you to like me. I guess that's gotten me you all along, but it wasn't worth it.

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