it's not that i think it isn't too much,
i just don't know if there's an exactly enough
the point is there is no point
that's what the drugs have taught me,
have allowed me to treat my life like an adventure,
like i am floating in a sea of an incomprehensible amount of time
and for now, weed is my companion
it follows me quietly, a little secret smile
practice makes perfect, and i am the master
nobody knows unless i let them
total control, channeling energy
gathering of the vibes
and i still see the energy dots everywhere, a blurring of rainbow light at the edges of everything
nothing is real, or at least nothing is realer than anything else
truthfully, we're only chemical reactions
i do drugs for the same reason people shop or eat or have sex
its a good feeling, a rush, but it doesn't leave you empty
the remainder of a beautiful evening can cling to your skin for weeks if you let it
more more more
i have nothing else better to do anyway
i used to say watch the sky whenever life got lonely
things are always changing,
the rain can't go on forever
but now, that seems powerless
i am more in control of my happiness than that
if i choose,i can ride out the storm
or i can pack up and jump on a plane to somewhere where there's warmer weather
the point is, there's always a choice
no one cares who you turn out to be a fraction as much as you
and even though you might have to search it out, find some bizarre sect of counterculture normal you would have felt embarrassed to even know about,
your true self learns that ringing certainty of home
is worth any amount of awkward explanations
love and affection
- January 16, 2012
- ideaofcrying
- No Comments
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