• I just want to be where the sun shines down walking outside at night, for miles and miles and feel floaty and free like a magazine girl with a nice boy who cares with his hand in mine drinking mango margaritas in a crowded sunday room and the music is loud and my blood is so steady that is the moment i want to get trapped in maybe we haven't changed as much as we thought our schemas, they readjust because they have to i don't want to be in love anymore mean words, true words, shoot from my mouth like angry streaks of fire i demand answers i demand love, understanding because this shoddy imitation is no longer good enough when i have moved onto something i can pretend is still perfect when i said i loved you i didn't mean it not today, probably not even last night you hurt me and i hate you you took every breath of happy right out of me and i am sick of sobbing on the floor does it bother you that we never talk anymore? do you even miss me? until now, i didn't let myself get this intense sadness has no direction i only let tears and what ifs cloud my everything but now i see you for what you are selfish a charlatan you said you would love me forever forever is a stupid word we meant til this got old who we were last year is gone i am now a girl with sunshine on her skin and you are a boy with a bong in his bedroom shit happens people leave and you replace them with a new and improved version who still has yet to break your heart

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