• Nothing makes sense anymore. I hate feeling guilty for shit anymore cause I used to beat myself up over that. Even where guilt should be, I do my best to avoid it. And then I feel no guilt for that. I'm one fucked up person. I just want her to walk out of my life one day; make me realize my shit. And I want her to stick to it; make me miss it. I honestly wanna feel like how things would be without that rock in my life. I just wanna be by myself & then do it all over again. I don't want this, I don't want any of this. This is all fucking bullshit & I'm doing it myself. So if I could make it appear so easily, I can make it disappear just as easily, right? For real, fuck you Natalie.

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