• And it's true I can't live without you. The thought let alone the actual physical sense of it sends trembles through my body. Sometimes there are words better left unsaid but when they surface, the scars they leave are far too tremendous to forget. I wish I could go back in time. I walked around aimlessly last night & couldn't help but think of all the situations I could've handled for the better sake of you, for you. I can't help but turn the ideas over in my head how much more he can give you. Then I just ask myself, why didn't you, why can't you, why couldn't you do this all for her? Love her unconditionally the way she so deserves. But I was so consumed in finding the girl you fell in love with that I fear you fell out of love with who I am now. I'm losing both sides of me & there's nothingness in my presence. It's painted on my face, it's etched into my body, burned in my mind. She's no longer mine. And there's just this void in me, there's a voice telling me that no matter what happens, my life with her just couldn't be the same. The promises I made. The hurt I inflicted. It's all me me me. I wish I could show that it's all about her. I want to close my eyes and let her inside. But I'm lost inside my head. My head is inflating with how many thoughts flutter my head. I'm already torn in half that she loves him. Is this how it always is?

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