I can't wait to figure out what wrong with me, so I can say this is the way that I used to be.

  • I've personally watched myself transform from academic over achiever, to B-C indie intellectual over the course of the past year. The only thing I'll ever be Advanced Proficient in again is making myself vomit, or hacking into a Facebook-blocked computer, or cutting class without getting caught. I've replaced my attention span with the ability to put skateboards together with my eyes closed. I donated my Juicy Couture sweat suits to the Salvation Army, and put all of my money toward the many discographies of bands that have undoubtedly gone to shit. I now spend my Friday nights watching 80's movies and drinking Chardonnay with my mom, rather than doing Kegstands or dancing around like a prostitute with my socialite friends. I ended my tanning membership, and rather invested in 2 packs of Marlboro Menthols a week. The biographies of John Lennon, Kurt Cobain, and Elliott Smith have replaced the stacks of Seventeen or Teen Vogue that used to be found in my room. I now pity the girls who have yet to realize that there is no boy on Earth that will ever love them as much as their father does, and I would give anything to go back and fix the mistakes I made before I actually decided to pay attention to the sermon at 9 o’clock mass. I'm changing, and it's fucking inevitable. In retrospect, I still haven't been relieved of the things I've always hated the most about myself. I still love too easily, and I still can't trust a soul. I still stutter my way through conversations with the opposite sex, and I still can't watch the 11 o'clock nightly news. I still hate Alanis Morisette, and I still refuse to cut my hair. I'm still a morning person, I still refuse to go to prom, I still say the Rosary while I drive, and I still have my heart set on that Tiffany & Co. two-carat princess-cut engagement ring that I've had picked out since I was 8 years old. I’m changing, but I’m not getting anywhere.
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2 Comments

  • but thanks :) I was a little bored in study hall and decided to vent a little.

    tfranchess_tragedyon April 18, 2010   Link

  • I just stumbled upon this and I loved it. "I now pity the girls who have yet to realize that there is no boy on Earth that will ever love them as much as their father does" Purely beautiful :)

    peacelovetiedyeon February 04, 2010   Link

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