• we never really know who we really are because once you think you have yourself figured out, you're already in the process of changing. it's comparable to the way you'll never know what your own voice actually sounds like. it's the same as a photograph of a moment. you don't look as happy or insecure as you felt when shrunk to 5x7. i'm lost but i keep making up directions for myself just so it looks like i have still have my cool. i never had cool though. i always had lukewarm and a big smile. i ran into a dead-end but i'll just move with the cheese, y'know. i don't really care "who moved it", i'm just going to sit and rest for a while. i'll get up, consult my crayola maps, and keep moving soon enough. i'm not going to do well on my exams. i don't know. i'm not as intelligent as i used to be. i'm a lot more psychotic though. i've always been hard to get along with after the first two weeks. connections are uncomfortable and it's easier to sever them when i get up. the best thing about that dead-end was finding "Los Campesinos!" they are amazing. suggestions of their music: "You! Me! Dancing!", "Knee Deep At ATP", and "The Sea Is A Good Place To Think About The Future". they sound so much better in this open corridor than they did in that cramped thought process you kept me in. the acoustics around you were horrible. and here, here they are clear. time is like buckley's.

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