what the fuck

  • has brought this mood on? breathe me on repeat, not a good sign. not willingly changing it even worse... perhaps reading will make it leave but do I want it to leave? .... yes. eventually I do anyway. I'll enjoy the depressed mood for as long as it lasts until my phone goes dead and breathe me turns off. I just don't want to bother her... I know I'm not but something is telling me to just leave her be for tonight. fucking heat; you're the problem. habig to work I your conditions for hours. I guess this is the price pay for photographing tennis, or any sport for that matter, it is inevitable. fuck inevitability. why can't I just do what I want as opposed to having all these fuckers hammering at me every minute. what joy, double pay. It'll be good for theatre tickets but if I by some chance fuck up I am royally screwed. I am not so up for that at the moment, instead I'll read, enjoy (I suppose) th mood I'm in... you thought I was strong. I still hit this state every so often. just happens to be when you're in victor. I bet . will tell you about this. mm, I don't really mind... on the note of . , I love her, she's awesome. I know she'll always be there to care, whereas I might turn into a superficial douchebag. I don't think I will, but you never know what bad choices or actions I might make in the future. this is quarter me, quarter heat and half sleep. much like txting and receiving "shoes" as opposed to "yours" I am just rambling without a care in the world. . (and no, not fullstop if you hadn't realised) I lovelovelove you for so much you've done... even if you don't realise it and for what it is you'll do in the future. who knows what it is? I don't... just sayin'. okay right this second after kind of talking weird not really gangster gangsterish in going to sleep before I really make a fool of myself. good night, adieu and farewell. OH I almost forgot. you selfish dick! honestly, what did you expect to happen! moron. I don't care how angry you get with me for saying this shit.. Is just ridiculous to do that when you know it might very well tip others over the edge. god damn it! >.< jesus, I just said god damn it. quick one. read john 14:10 I think that's it... for all you haters out there.
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