what now??

  • i've been thinking about it. it just hasn't sunk in. today was a good day. but i keep thinking about it. i don't know what to feel. i'm not numb.. i have my feelings. i don't think i've turned cold. but i just don't know what to feel. i'm fine. really, i'm fine. i just don't want to see them together because i'm scared i might just breakdown. i haven't really seen them together much, maybe that's why i'm not so sad. but this is weird. i know i can't avoid them forever. i really just don't know how to feel. i'm just living. i mean, there's something missing, but it doesn't feel like it. i'm not complete, but it doesn't feel like anything is missing. i can't describe it. i've actually been happier though.. so this is weird. tuesday was a very good day though. i concentrated better in class, had a very nice day. but idk. i'm weird. what to feel... what to feel.
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