• [wednesday 20th may] 3:20am (approx) but i dont know what it is about her, theres something special there u just cant explain.. and im afraid that ill do something stupid sooner or later if i havent already.. i know i shldnt have come back here, because all it does is really feed it >< it goes up n down to be honest tho, but that was just my weak attempts at trying to resist it, to suppress it, because i know its not good for me.. i cant think clearly anymore these days.. and i dont know why its so hard to let go.. i mean i honestly dont even know her that well enough i think that would register such emotions =/ she is a good friend to me, and i hope i dont do anything to ruin that by putting my feelings first.. but then u would just wonder ur whole life, that u let that something go.. i dont know anymore.. anyways this isnt really meant to be here, i shld really fill in what has happened inbetween the long posts.. but not now, i just know i only came on here to say this, get it out someway or another.. *end impulsive train of thought* heh songofthemoment keri hilson/ne-yo/kanye west - knock you down "sometimes love comes around and it knocks you down just get back up when it knocks you down"

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