• 1 week since last post, well i have good reasons for that; in short its been a very busy long week...ill try to recap the important stuff in what little time i have since i shld be waking up in abt 5 hrs >< monday 9th march first day back at uni, managed to wake up on time and get to uni by 9. maths was boring as usual and no seats until later in the lecture.. then 2 hour break, cant rem what i did actually then, i think it was a mix of working/studying and met up with sherman n jess. that was nice since i havent seen them for awhile, altho the other guy was there and yeah couldnt do much, looks like their hittin it off, even tho sherman keeps goin abt us two, yeah right..i know its not gonna happen so why do i keep puttin my self thru this? math tute at 1 was interesting, met some new guys at hte back of class, and teacher is some old guy who cant really teach or remember how to. then java lab with them two, best part of the day bein with two good friends, altho i think i went too far with a small joke by not opening the locked door for her, i dont know why i did it, i guess i was still trying to act like i didnt care abt her, its so hard to when u want the opposite, but for the sake of the friendship thats what its come down to. sherman keeps jokin abt us two bein interested in each other, i wish..so she was pissed for awhile but then thankfully it subsided and i was forgiven over the elearning vista chat...better than nothin i spose, and she seemd to be bit better.. class went on as usual got thru like half of the work. then lecture, which was at law bldg.. not many ppl, small lecture room, so thats good. we all sat back row and i was really gettin tired near the end i think i had a few microsleeps, i realised too late tho that the other two were watching me look stupidly sleepy, sigh, atleast she got a laugh out of it. then we went to econ lecture which was just next door, she stayed back with us a bit to just chat, sherman does his usual 'u guys look good together' thing :S, gosh thanks, make it more awkward.. altho we both know his just joking, cant really tell from her expression whether she genuinely is interested or just a good friend as she seems to be with guys.. tuesday 10th march managed to gym in the morning, then eco tute, but spent a bit too long in gym so was rushing on the way to uni. wore diff shorts, so my timetable was in my jeans >< so didnt know where class was.. great.. had to ring sherman to confirm, but as we found out later, we went to the wrong room anyway.. which kinda sux coz knew some ppl in there and got a decent tute question (wk11).. then 1 hr break in quad labs, sherman stayed back a bit, jess was surrounded by the other guy as usual, so couldnt really talk much.. think we did usual newspaper stuff and read up on the 3 hour lecture.. the 3 hour lecture was in the mech eng bldg, far from the quad labs and the bldg is boring and huge, but it didnt matter coz i was alone with her =) got some quality time with her, always feels like theres something more, but gotta remind myself to be wait patiently, last thing i want is for her to get the wrong idea.. so i tried to be a bit detached during the lecture, even tho it felt like she wanted to talk more.. during the break we walked a bit around the bldg just talking abt the holidays and her "drinking" experience, which was 1 glass of pina colada, heh cute. so i had to share my drinking story from the beach house, was a bit more than 1 glass and i had to leave some details out coz i wasnt exactly proud or remember? some of what happened, just that it was a great night and everyone was a bit too happy haha. so we ended up goin back to the lecture and somehow we came to decide we wanted to present for week 2 (which starts tmr..great) but better get it over n done with..then we caught the metro 10 bus coz she was goin townhall to bus it home since it would be too late for her parents. on the bus we exchanged mp3s, cant remember why. altho it took some convincing to listen to hers (i dont know why, but it felt a bit weird when she didnt let) but then when she actually did, she then let me listen to this song (Jessica Mauboy - Been Waiting), at first i thought it would be meh ok, but as soon as it came on all the other sounds blocked out and all i could hear was the beat and the lyrics..it was a good song, i think we both liked it for the beat, but what caught me was the lyrics, i couldnt help but realise it was a song abt what was happening to me right now, and maybe her as well? so it hit me hard a bit, and i couldnt help but think...was she trying to send me a sign? i was really stumped, if this was something or i was just making it out to be something..i reasoned with it oculdnt be because shes always talkin abt jason and seems to be more interested in dean, but yeah it didnt help my situation =/ wednesday 11th march gymed in the morning. so today was the day she wanted to try breakdancing, but i couldnt since it clashed with my maths =/ but she ended up not goin and apparently she doesnt want the other guy to watch her? i dont know what to make out of that.. maths was interesting, managed to get a spot at the back next to these two international students. new to australia and into mountain biking, surfing and want to see more of sydney, so i might take em out one time when were all free, tourist style so they can get some more out of australia, just need to get this huge workload done first..oh and bumped into niance and steph after. and apparently alice saw me in the maths lecture tho missed her coz i was sorta late. thursday 12th march morning gym, gotta keep the routine up if i wanna get somewhere ;) maths tute was good, met some white dude, and there was some hot chick who came late but there was some dude in between us. tho might say hi next time, never know could be something in it =) tutor is good, knows her stuff well and doesnt waffle on. econ lecture was good, always interesting, probly the best subject this sem, makes me wanna change to a comm degree, still considering it. then got some books and homed it. friday 13th march went uni in the morning, to work on presentation. ofcourse she wasnt alone when i got there. so i had to endure the trio thing for awhile, tho we talked a bit and showed her a few things, and we had a nice lil notepad convo, which was cute. ended up deciding on a code word, which is codeword, which means to change subject coz she theres someone in the room most likely her mum..brought high quality noise cancellation headphones so used that all day, so i could listen to quality music and pretend to not be interested or available to talk haha, i know its stupid, but its better than the alternative and having to listen in on them two talking..got some work done and a few ideas, compiled them for the 2pm meeting with the lecturer. the place was at AGSM which is at the absolute end of campus in a tiny corner.. long walk but didnt mind at all since was just us two, so we got to catch up a bit and talk. she brought some things abt relationships and whether its awkward to be 'coupley' in public and ofcourse non-stop stuff abt jason. we just mucked arnd inside the AGSM bldg, since we had no clue where the lecturers office was. at one point we were asked if were med students haha, oops wrong bldg. finally found the room but lecturer was preoccupied, so we got to chat a bit in the hallway. its cute that she thinks i smell nice, she likes rexona men deo hehe, hey some is better than none =) shes always asking whether she looks good in what she has on that day, ofcourse no matter what she wears she looks good to me, but obviously i cant say that so i just say, u can pull of nearly anything, except what im wearing haha. then she replies that she could pull it off, so i tell her nah not possible lol, that goes on for a bit. she does flirt alot, which took awhile to learn, so its hard to tell whether the interest is genuine or just playful. finally the lecturer let us in, and we tried to sus out every detail abt the presentation while reminding Pradeep Ray (lecturer) that we are beginners and not to kill us. i cant rem what we talked abt on the way back, but it didnt matter as long as we were taking. then back inside we packed up and headed off to the buses. ended up changing queues for buses and nearly missed the bus we got on, it was filling up fast. went townhall but she bought something on the way, so i just stood outside and talkd COD4 with dean, didnt know he played it, atleast we got somethin to talk abt. then when she finally came out and walked past us she looked pissed, i think coz she was late for her train or coz we were busy talking to each other, i dont know which but if she was worried abt being late then why did she stay at the cake store so long? i dunno. trained it to revesby, thaknfully had the decent headphones, so i could relax peacefully. their awesome, and i think coz of them some cute asian chick was looking my way, tho i was too busy thinking abt jess so i just ignored most of it, its interesting how much attention u get when u give less attention, esp unintentionally, i guess its natural because when u dont have that then u instinctively look for it. i dunno what im tlaking abt now coz its past 3am and im so dead for tmr... night gym was good, diff crowd but managed to get alot done in short period of time, trained it home, train at night is always nicer than during the day, everything feels more. felt a bit stupid on the train tho coz i ended up "playing the piano" and mouthing lyrics all the way home, weird ey, felt nice at the time but just feels retarded thinking abt it now. saturday 14th march not much on the weekends, just some catch up and went buffet at bankstown rsl, spent time with family. friend msnd me at night and wasnt feeling the best, his been down all week, problems with his gf so i just listend to what he had to say, i just hope everything turns out for him, his had a harsher week than me and by what he told a complicated holiday. im just glad we could talk abt it, its always better when u talk abt it. after he ended up doin his usual poke arnd to try and sus out that i like her, wanted to talk abt it with him but i dont think it was the right time, also make things more awkward..gosh why does everything have to lead to bein awkward. sunday 15th march at home all day trying to get this presentation done, but ended up playing these new board games with family my auntie got, their so addictive and fun lost track of time..gosh im gonna have to pull an allnighter -.- she called at the end of one noisy game, felt a bit embarassed coz it was so noisy and i wasnt working on the presentation at the time and she seemed really hard working n serious.. so later when i went out for a walk around the block a few times i called her back to just talk, ended up being a bit of an awkward call, my voice felt strained and i think she heard that.. in short i think i shdnt have called, felt even weirder when she said "thanks for calling" gosh i feel like an idiot now.. why did i do that.. and now ive been doing presentation work while also finding new music..i really need to get a proper routine goin for uni. i wonder how this week is gonna turn out. songofthemoment jessica mauboy - been waiting its ironic that she was the one who introduced this song and their first names are the same.. coincidence can be so cruel. "Wanna tell you but I can't find the words to say, So afraid if I do things will never be the same, Don't wanna lose a friend but why should I pretend, That I don't love you when I've waited so long,"

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