• summer really fixed me and taught me how to get over myself and in that process, get over other people as well. everyone who leaves my life, eventually comes back. it's just that my smile works mostly like a revolving door, and the inside of my mouth has a slew of secrets with broken parachutes. i'd be nothing without them and i regret it everytime one of them manages to fly away. i've decided that i love them more than i love the people who leave and come back coz a secret either stays or leaves forever. you cant take back a secret. it's terrible. when i was younger, other kids used to tell me that something is not a secret until atleast one person knows it. and thats the first filthy lie i ever heard. a secret becomes nothing but a joke when someone else finds it out. i'm extremely excited for the throwback(where you dress up from a past era) dance. i'm going classy forties and i have this really amazing dress that i keep wanting to put on over and over again just so i can admire myself in it. funny how the silliest things can make you love yourself. i have bright red lipstick and very long false eyelashes that i'll be wearing. most people will be going retro, but not i. still trying to figure out what to do with my hair though. its very long and curly. i might leave it as is, maybe just pulling up the bangs. the dance is on thursday so i have a bit of time to decide. but i look about 25 in that dress and the strappy stilletto-like heels. i swear i'm not trying to grow up too fast, but sometimes you just need a break from acting your age. i get a volcano in my lungs everytime i hear this song, and its despicable. my heart's surrendered any leftover feelings and i'm happy as hell, but something really must be done about all this lava. love and jealousy burn up too fast. use coal instead.

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