• Somtimes i feel like a stranger in my family we're talking but it feels like i'm silent my words taste so shallow e,pty i don't want to sit and talk, stay fro a while i just want to run, get back up stairs back to hiding, back to writing i scream to music at the top of my lungs i love lyrics, colliding and crashing i never want anything to hold onto someone get the damn phone it's taking over my head Sometimes i think i made it all up that this is only a story i'm telling myself that really, i'm another person in an alternate universe just following along on the edges of normal can anyone tell i'm strange when they look in my eyes because if i look in the mirror, i start to see it it creeps up on me at first, like a hidden shadowy light but suddenly, spark turns to fire and for a second a start to wonder if maybe i really am beautiful afterall i need to get my focus together stop being so stubborn it's just two more years, two more wasted years or atlkeast that's what i tell myself when i can't fall asleep i know i'm indebted to my parents forever i know i'll probably have to make room for my sister in the nexrt part of my life but honestly, it genuinely hurts me how different wew seem how can they not see the world in the terrible way i do? how can they not see the statues crumbling how can they see more sky than cloud it hurts so bad because i can't escape it reality just is there's no shaking a life story there's no waking up, recovering i wish i could get that thank god i't not real feeling even just a little please help me pretend?

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