• this weekend. oh lord. this fucking weekend. it was the worst weekend i've had in awhile but it was also fantastic. fucking glorious. so many good laughs, so many hugs, so many nights walking around downtown when it's POURING, high out of our minds and not caring who gives a fuck. let's start at the beginning. Thursday was an mind-shattering day. I want to tell the story casually but I don't know if I can. Steven and I both decided to go to Subway in Montgomery City, which is like 15 miles away from my house. And since I live in the country, you have to go down a main road to get there... On the way back, it was me in the driver's seat and Steven in the passenger. We were enjoying a comfortable silence when he suddenly grabbed my leg and said, "did you see that? turn around!" He sounded more curious than scared so I was like, kay. But I immediately regretted it as soon as I swung the car around and the headlights settled on the...mess in front of us. It was a car. But it wasn't a car. It was half of a car. And upside-down. I never seen the bottom of a car before....it looks so..fake. I hope I never see the bottom of one again. As soon as I seen the car that was flatened like a pancake, I felt sick to my stomach. We pulled in to the gravel road it was by and Steven jumped out of the car before I even stopped. I took off my seatbelt and opened my door but I couldn't get out. My legs were rocks and my heart was playing a fuckin blastbeat drum solo. I felt sick and hot and dizzy. Time seemed to slow down. I couldn't believe that I was seeing this again. This time, I know it's rude and selfish, but this time I was hoping my best friend wasn't dead inside. Steven ran directly to the neighbor's house.. and I finally pulled myself out of the car. I shakily grabbed my cellphone and dialed 911. I gave them all the information I could. No, I don't know if anyone is in the car. No, I can't tell what kind of car it is. Yes, I can wait here until you get here. My name is Kim. Here is my cellphone number. Please Hurry. "Hello! Hello!" I said, "is anybody in there? Is anybody alive in there? Hello!" Nothing. Silence. Back-breaking, heart-shattering silence. I got sick and threw up in the ditch. I was wiping my mouth off when I thought I had heard a knock. I ran closer to the car but nothing happened. "Hello?" A faint knock. "Are you in there?" It gains momentum. "Hello! Hello! Are you okay?" It gains volume. "We're getting you help! Please, please stay still. Please don't fucking die. We're getting help. I called the ambulance." The knocking continues till it seems to envelope my ear drums. "Please, everything is okay. The ambulance is coming. I called 911. You're gonna be fine. Please, it's gonna be okay." Before I could barely finish my sentence, I heard a loud, on-going moan come from the field nearby the car. Oh god, i thought, there's someone else? I don't know what to fucking do. Where the fuck is Steven? I can't do this by myself. I'm weak and I'm sick. I'm not brave enough. "Hello? Is there someone in the field?" "Help," I heard so so softly, "my back. My back, it hurts. I can't mo--" I panicked. "Hello? HELLO!? HELLO!! oh god Hello?! Please say something. Tell me where you are. Help me. Please tell me where you are. Don't you fucking die either! We're getting help now! Please stay alive!" Steven, and the ambulance, arrived as I was desperately yelling into a cornfield. I was so caught up in everything, I started crying. I didn't even know these people, not one clue who they were. I told the ambulance guy that there was at least one person in the car and someone in the field. I wanted to stay, oh how I wanted to stay but they made us leave. The weirdest thing was, after everything had happened, after the story had been told to Josh and Joe, my sister, Mom and Mike and my grandparents, me and Steven went upstairs. We didn't say anything but we didn't need too. We then proceeded to have the best love-making sesh known to man. The next morning I woke up, my mom told me the girl in the cornfield had broken her back, she's already moving her head and arms, but not her legs. I asked her about the woman in the car. She said they didn't find anyone in there. The girl in the cornfield was the only one who was driving in the car. I then proceeded to cry again. Now Friday. This is a complete change of mood. Ready? After school, we went to Stef's house to see if her boyfriend (who had turned 21 the day before) would buy us alcohol, haha. When we pulled up, though, Travis (her boyfriend) was sitting in the car and we heard screaming coming from the house. Travis said that Stef's aunt had called Travis' parents and told them that she's only 15, and Travis got pissed and was threatening to break up with Stephanie. Stephanie storms out of the house with her aunt and Carla following after her. She hops into OUR car and tells us to burn the fuck out so we were like uhh.. okay. haha. We ended up getting Everclear which is, if you didn't know, 95% alcohol. I only needed 2 shots and I was drunk already. It tastes so utterly gross, though... So we went up to Mexico and hung out at Josh and Joe's house until they got off work. Not alot happened there, me and Stephanie got high and watched Old School while Steven slept. Then Josh got off worrrrk early so we then proceeded to get drunk, high, and then we snorted percocets and vicodin which was the craziest thing i've ever felt....it doesn't last long enough though. too bad, too sad. Saturday: Went to work with a hangover, but in a suprisingly fantastic mood. I had such a good time there. Plus I got hella tips :) Steven picked me up from work and then we headed off to Columbia, which is about an hour and 20 minutes away. We got lost like hella but I had a good good time :) It was raining, but we didn't give a fuck. We parked about a mile of our destination and walked down the street. The Mizzou football game was on, I think, and sooo many drunk people in the streets yelling "MIZZOU! MIZZOU! FUCK YEAHHHHHH!!!" One girl even walked (stumbled) up to me and was like "Hey! M-I-Z..." and then she pointed to me so i was like "o-u?" and then she screamed gleefully and hugged me. Then she realized I spelled it wrong and threw her beer on me. Hahaha. But she apologized immediately and hugged me again. So, all is well I guess? Two homeless guys asked us for money. The first guy didn't really ask, he just kind of demanded so we were like uh, no. The second guy seemed really sad, and said that all he needed was a dollar for a sandwich. Steven said no, but I gave him a 5. That shit tugs on my heartstrings so bad. I ran back to the other homeless guy and gave him all my change which probably added up to at least 3 bucks. He was happy and asked for a hug, but I just kinda awkwardly laughed and was like "ohhh, no, anything for an old friend!" and then walked away quickly. Haha. We went to this skateboard/tattoo/piercing shop and bought a cute little pipe and a cleansing drink (Steven has to take a drug test tomorrow) and the guy at the register was so hitting on Steven. I thought it was cute though cause he was super hot :P We then proceeded to buy probably 15 records, for about 6 bucks and then a pack of juicy fruit:) Then we bought a quarter of nugs for 50, which is pretty expensive, but it was so worth it. Oh my. We went to Josh and Joe's house after that in Mexico and smoked that shit UP. Steven was kinda pissed since he couldn't smoke, but he wasn't grouchy or anything. We went down to this sports bar and played a coupple games of pool, and then got kicked out. I lost two bowls of weed, a lighter and 32 cookies to Josh, though. hahah. He's such a hustler. We walked back in the rain. it was so amazing. I kept jumping in puddles and then they just picked me up and threw me in one. It was cold but it was so perfect. When we got home, me and Josh smoked again. Wowww. I was so blazed.. I grabbed the keyboard and started playing drum beats on it. Steven had the electric guitar in the amp and Josh had an acoustic guitar. It sounded tight. Or, at least to me and Josh it did. hahaha. We left almost as soon as Joe got home because I really needed to pass out. I had two shots of Everclear and then we smoked 2 percs. I didn't feel so well but I tried to act like I did, haha. We had to pull over twice so I could throw up, but I think Steven secretly likes taking care of me when I'm drunk since I don't let him do it when I'm sober :P The weirdest part of the whole weekend, I think, is when we got to my house (I live at least 10 miles from the nearest town, 50 from the nearest city.) someone pulled in right behind us. His buddy was passed out in the seat and he needed directions how to get back to Jefferson City. The thing that sucked was, it was dark, raining, he was drunkkk and at least 100 miles away from Jeff City. At first he asked us to show him where I-70 was, which wouldn't be that bad, it's only like 20-30 miles away, but we didn't have enough gas so we drilled the directions into him over and over, and then finally just wrote it down. At one point, he got out of the car to go pee and just happened to stumble right into me and grab my boob. Hahaha, I wasn't really mad, but I just hoped Steven wouldn't get mad and like, kick him onto the road without any help, but he just laughed and helped him up :). Anyways, in exchange for giving him directions he gave us probably a 20sack of weed, and it's some fireeee fucking shit! It's from J. City man! I felt bad smokin it right in front of Steven but he asked me to test it out. Mmmm baby! And now today: we woke up and decided to go to Middletown to get some gas. the road we took was SUPER fucking flooded, we got out and walked through it to town (which wasn't even a mile away) and the current was so strong. At one point it was up to my waist and i was just holding on to a Street sign for survival. Haha, it was so fun though. Then we found a baby mole and put it back somewhere safe. I think me and Steven should go like, into an animal rescue business, because we've rescued 5 cats now, over 20 turtles, 2 dogs, 3 puppies, a baby deer and now a baby mole. It's fun though. I lovelovelove it. I love everything. Yay for love. :) i'm so tired of typing. haha. jesus. remember, friends: Doing wrong is never right, but doing right is never wrong.

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