• Call, I'm Desperate For Your Voice. I'm so torn up, it's not even funny. I'm physically hurting. Everyone around me is letting me down. "And I'm tired of being all alone." I want to scream and cry til my lungs collapse all together. I'm utterly sick of myself and everyone around me. This happens all too much. It's an all too familiar feeling. No one makes me happy anymore. All I do is listen, and try to say the right thing. I usually fail. But I'm always here, always listening to their problems. Nodding, consoling. When is it my turn? I think I need to be nodded at. I need to be consoled. My hands are shaking really hard. I just need someone. Anyone. Soneone to hold my hand and tell me everything's okay. And I want to believe them. I don't want to feel like they're saying it to shut me up. Or because they just don't understand what I'm saying. I want to feel something real. I hate feeling like I'm so perfect for someone, only to have it go unnoticed. I always feel like I'm jumping up and down, waving my arms in the air, and I'm never noticed. What more should I do? What more can i do? I feel so helpless, it's not even funny. I'm so fucking hard on myself. I'm always the ugly one. I never get the guy in the end. I never know what to say to make them stick around. I feel like I put myself in the same position all the time - Spotlight's on me, and I choke. I ruin it with a single remark. I never know how to show how I feel. Possibly because I don't know how I feel. I want someone to go out of their way to get to know me. Really, really know me. I'm scared to go back to school. What if they don't like me as much as they did last year? What if I'm not as pretty as they remember? Not as funny? Not as cool? Not... anything. Courtney Burgess, junior year: EPIC FAIL. And yeah I don't give a shit about my full name being there. You wouldn't stalk me anyway, right? I just don't know what to feel. I'm so painfullly alone, it seems. I can be in a room of 1000 people, and I'll feel alone. Standing next to my best friends, I feel like nothing. Sarah's the daring crazy athletic-looking hot one. Amber's the wierd, yet beautiful one. Nichole's the witty, trendy, gorgeous European looking one. Matty's the token HOT gay guy, who just so happens to have a million and three friends. Courtney's the.... sidekick. Always the sidekick. Just left of accepted. I just want to get really fucked up. Get fucked up, and make mistakes. I don't want to think about anything past the now. Just Drink, Smoke, Fuck, and Forget.

• No Comments

Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.

Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!