• time is of the essence. i didn't do any of the things i said i wouldn't do. and i'm still convincing myself of my sobriety. did blow. yesterday. head hurts still. bought valium, didn't take them. apparently my dealer is in the hospital upon taking some? Not sure it's worth the risk. today. worked. too long, too hard. showered. still didn't take the valium. went on a weed deal. mistook a families white pick up truck for my dealers truck. embarassing. funny, really. went to bible study. saw pastor at a party? corrupt. the book of revelation interpretations are flawed. pre-mid-post? good song: kanye west- addiction. burnt rubber. ran over a curb. peeled out. hit an rv? sober too. i should start wearing my glasses. im in love. it sucks. im euphoric. not even the kind of euphoria attributed to coke. im in love. and i hate it. i usually have a lot more walls up. i suppose because i know he wont make the effort to tear them down, they're as a result, just coming down. weird psychology. makes sense though. i assure you it's all very platonic. jealousy is murder to the soul. i can't sympathize but i see the way girls, the way guys look at me.. like there inner being is being destroyed, a pit of fury reveling deep. im not as smart, or pretty, or witty as anyone thinks. i don't think people believe me when i say i will hurt them, i will manipulate them, i will dissapoint them. cant sleep. wont sleep. im so hungry.. why cant i remember to eat? revel 3:1 “I know your works, that you have a name that you are alive, but you are dead."

• No Comments

Log in now to tell us what you think this song means.

Don’t have an account? Create an account with SongMeanings to post comments, submit lyrics, and more. It’s super easy, we promise!