• For me its gonna be a long long way to happy. Even though I've attepted to destroy my feelings for alex me of all people should know feelings can't just be destroyed. Don't get me wrong I can stop loving alex but its gonna take time. I'm still hurt right now and in a way I'm still speechless. Now I can at least say more than I could ealier. Its like my life is so... I'm not sure its like I have nothing to say. Alex hurt me so much after he claimed he liked me. Its like he's a compulsive liar and I can't tell his truths from his lies anymore. I've bothered so many of my friends about this alex crap. I wish I could apologize to them all and also thank them because they didn't have to listen to me complain and bitc** about something that couldve been avoided. I feel like its impossible for me to ever feel the way I used too. I used to think love was a bunch of bull crap. I didn't think it was real but now I know now I see. Things are different now better? Worse? Thatll be decided whenever I go to sleep and wake up

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