• okay so the fake happiness has sort of worn off and now i'm just left tired and disappointed and pretty pissed with xavi. i wish i didn't have to keep making up excuses for him in my head - it's not fair, he shouldn't even be having to use them in the first place. FUCK, i don't know. if he comes to izzy's on saturday -- well, we'll have a whole house to ourselves until the morning and i can imagine it being funny as fuck if nothing else. but there'll probably be something else. and knowing me, spineless little crap that i am, i'll let him do it. i'm fucking hopeless at this love thing. ...on a lighter note. my mum just correctly recognised & identified joshua radin 'star mile'. legend.

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