• i am so addicted to compliments and i'm so jealous. i hate it. i know it's not right but i can't stand when other people are or are perceived as being better than me i have to be perfect i have to be the best i can't be happy for anyone else it has to be me i'm so over myself why can't i get over myself? how contradictory will i get before i explode!? seriously.. there is one side of me that looks out for myself all the time and feels sorry for myself and makes me feel better and judges other people [flesh] and another side that constantly reminds me that it's wrong and that we're all equal and that i don't need their opinions [spirit] i wish that side would win but i'm afraid it's a lot less satisfying anyway i'm VERY tired. and so sick of stupid friends who never come through and who think they're SO GREAT [hypocritical much?] more that they have to let everyone know...

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