was yesterday. it sucked. majorly. I -ran away (well sorta) -threatened to move out -was almost forced to go see a pshycologist -was grounded i think thats it =\ so. it was my moms bday, and it started off good. i took a shower, and i was blow drying my hair, when, for the 5th time, my mom felt the need to remind me to pick up my room. i knew i had to, but i was in the middle of doing sumthing, so i said, "i know. i will. but im in the middle of doing sumthing. i'll do it when im done" but that apparently wasnt the right answer. she flipped out at me, ran into the bathroom, slammed the door. and started crying. sooooooo not my fault. so i finished up in the bathroom, and went and picked up my room. she was still locked in there so i went onto the computer. my sister then decided, that this was her problem, because she came down and said "wat did u do?" so i told her. adn she said "this is her day. y cant u just let her be happy?" so by that point i was pissed. i took my computer and moved to the basement, where my mom found me, and started yelling at me for an hour. i threatened to move out. so she threatened to take me to her pschycologist, so she wnet upstairs, and i called amanda, and she was gonna pick me up to go out with her because i couldnt be home. so my mom decides that we're gonna go out, and i told her i wasnt going, and she said "well, what are u gonna do?' so i said "im going out" which apparently im not allowed to do. so she flipped, told me to go move out, i said fine. and i left. she called my dad, who called me, but i didnt pick up. i didnt wnat to talk to anyone. so she apparently didnt think i was actually going out, so she thot i ran away, which i kinda did. i wasnt gonna come back. i was gonna sleep over amandas, but my dad told me i had to go back home. so i did. and we barely talked the entire nite. so yeah. thats about as fucked up as you can get. i started thinking abotu what she wud do if i killed myself. if she wud care. because as she so clearly stated, im a burden to her and this household. yesterday sucked. my eyes were all swollen and red from crying. make up was all over my face. and just, idk. i _want_ to go to a pschycologist or sumthing, but no way in HELL wud i let her know. thats it for now going bowling in a bit with some friends. new york for the week tomorrow. cant wait. i need to get away.