• he seemed so happy it was over... and then i found this out [slightly edited for clarity]: "he didn't want you to feel bad. this we [my friend and him] have talked about. he wasn't glad to get rid of u, no, he's just doing his best not to take it hard because he knew you thought it was best" i don't even want to know the implications of that. i don't want to feel worse than i already do. i figured something out, though. i originally asked him out because he was such a comfort to me. as time went by and he gradually stopped talking to me, that level of comfort drastically dropped until i couldn't talk to him at all. and that's when i ended it. ...and now he talks to me again. i'm enjoying being single again, i really am. but i miss that comfort of three months ago... that's what i really miss. not the time i lost. the familiarity. the only bad thing about being single is JB... i have a sinking feeling he likes me. especially after wednesday.. he was going so out of his way on the bus to make sure i noticed him. [hi. hi. hi. repeated until i finally said it back. and then he shut up, more or less.] he is an ass. and he looks like a rat. if there is one person i like less than him, though, it's DF. somebody get him to leave me alone.

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