• 5am on the bathroom floor From the night before Do you find me dreadful? Tiff's party on Sautrday. basically MASSIVE PISS UP. and i haven't got mashed in a while, and i sure need to. only. i kind of.. promised Adam i wouldn't get drunk? D: D: DDDDDDDDD: he doesnt see the point in doing stupid things and not remembering the morning after.. and i do. =/ i just think its amazing... getting absolutely hammered, getting with a load of people you dont know, having an absolute fucking laugh with your mates, dancing 'til you drop, sleeping where you fall, and coming round on the bathroom floor.. and even better if you got it all on camera. i dont know.. its part of that horrible, glamourous lifestyle i was on about earlier. =/ last time i started to think people only liked me when i was drunk so i got mashed. only i upset my friends when i told them i wouldnt sober up 'cause they wouldnt like me anymore... so maybe its a bad plan. and being drunk was the only time in which i could get with people. true fact. so i did. and if i get drunk Adam won't do anything with me... its so sweet of him. he said he doesnt want to take advantage of me. even tho he wouldnt be. 'cause id want him to anyway. if you see what i mean. but yeah if im drunk i get nothing. and if im drunk i know im gonna be trying to get in his pants all night. or even worse, someone elses. but hopefully i wont go that far this time. in fact, i could film everything if i stayed sober. and that would be damn funny. but still, it's usually me thats being filmed.. and its gonna be hard to give up the spotlight. =/ im in two minds. i'll have worked it out by saturday. and a promise is a promise.

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