• I am once again being consumed with sadness. I haven't texted C all day and I'm trying to keep myself busy so I won't text him. I'm hoping that he'll text me first, but that's not likely. He's a guy, they're stupid sometimes... Wait-all the time. Next week H, F, V, and I are going to see "Prom Night". That movie looks great. In a way I'm hoping that F will get so scared that she won't go to the prom with her dumbass boyfriend. I've been trying to talk C into going to see that movie with me, but so far he still says "no" b/c he doesn't like to go to the movies. Bullshit! I really don't know what to do. I was reading a pamphlet last night on depression. I have most of the symptoms. Hmmmmm....... What would my friends think if I told them I have depression? Well I can't tell them that b/c I don't honestly know if I have it. In a way I kinda hope I do b/c I would know why I haven't been able to get out of bed lately, why I've been neglecting my schoolwork, not been hanging out with my friends as often, and more shit that I won't get into right now. The only time I don't feel sad/angry/hopeless is when I'm reading. In the past week I've read "Looking For JJ", "Skinny", "Thirteen Reasons Why", "What Happened to Cass McBride", "Smack", and "Doing It". This is gonna sound really cheesy, but here it goes: reading takes me to a different world. A world where I'm too busy getting to know other characters and dealing with their problems to deal with my own... I love reading. I've recently decided to be a writer. I think I'll write teen books, but who knows? Song: "Hold On" by Good Charlotte

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