My life is not falling apart. I did not break up with a boyfriend, my best friend didn't steal my crush. I'm not failing any classes at school, I hardly ever fight with my mom, I have a well-paying job that I enjoy. I've never inflicted self-harm, I'm not addicted to drugs, alcohol, or sex. I have self respect. I have self respect. I have self respect. It's a beautiful day. I have a spring break's worth of beautiful days ahead of me. My theme song right now is not a depressing one, full of self-loathing and hatred. My theme song right now is "Skies So Blue" by The Rocket Summer, which, for me, is simply about being happy because the sky is blue and there's no reason to be sad. I want to lay down in the grass and smell the air. I want to sit on a tree branch and let my legs dangle. I want to pick flowers and give them to my mom. I want to walk barefoot through the local garden store. I want to play pattycake with my little sister, sitting on a lawn chair, sipping lemonade. I want quintessence.