So, I was walking home on a warm sunny day in December. Yes. It was warm and sunny, in December. You may think “that’s crazy” but my answer would be “I think not” And why would that be my answer? Because I am crazy. So, back to the story. I was walking home, and had the sudden urge to do something with chewing gum. Not bubble gum, Chewing gum. I did not want to blow a bubble, or chew it. I wanted to stick up my nose. But I realized that I have tiny little hairs in my nose called cilia that would stick to the gum. So, if and when I tried to pull the gum out, it would get stuck and it would hurt like a bitch to pull it out or it would be one very awkward hair cut. So, what else could one do with a piece of chewing gum? Well, you could snort it, snuff it, and stick under the desk. But would that be very exciting, or healthy? I think not. I think you should stick in some ones hair. And I will explain to you the reasons for this. For one, you will not be the one in need of a haircut, peanut butter, and ice cubes. Two, once you stick it, it’s no longer your problem, but now the problem of the one it was stuck to. Three, if the person did not want to have gum stuck to their hair, they should not have bothered you. Note: If you are going to stick gum in some ones hair, make sure you have a logical reason to do it. If you said ‘I was bored’, there will be consequences to pay. Four, they cheated on you. Remember, there has to be a reason to compel you to do such an insane action upon someone. Fifth, you just don’t like them. There is nothing wrong with not liking someone. It’s perfectly normal and natural and it does not mean that you are insane. Sixth, you have an annoying sibling and you want to upset them and make them go insane trying to get the chewing gum out of their hair. If that is the case, and they really never did anything harmful to you, then that is perfectly acceptable. So, I hope that before you stick the chewing gum in your mouth next time, you will think of what other uses it could possibly have.