• and I'm the pen their officially going out. he keeps texting me and commenting my facebook, but i won't answer, at least i hope i won't. I've deleted his number from my phonebook but it seems i've memorized his number in teh past two years. But there is a light at the end of the tunnel and his names a. i have two classes with him and for a while did not even consider him as anything, friend or other. he's not my type at all. i usually go for older and better looking and more jackass like. don't get me wrong, he's not ugly but he's one of the nicest guys i've ever met. he's not a saint either but hes jsut amazing. everyone says all we do is flirt but i dont know if i want to have anything with him besides beign friends. reason(s) being : 1) I just got out of an on and off 2 year relationship that ended terribly and i don't know if i'm ready for anything serious and don't want to hurt his feelings. 2) i ruin guys. once i get bored i either dump them or treat them like shit and then dump them later. i don't do it on purpose, i just find every reason to make my actions seem legit but then later look back and realize how mean i actually was. 3) he's good friends with one of my bests and i know she liked him at one point and i don't want to put their relationship in an awkward spot. 4) i have this 'rule' about guys from the same town that go to the same school. i mean i have a reputation to uphold and not that i'm a slut or anyhting which i totally am not but i dont like the whole school gossiping about whats going on. i like them knowing jsut what i tell them and with someone from the same school it's impossible to keep it on the DL. s says i'm just making excuses and taht she thinks i should just go for it because he obviously likes me to but idk . i'm not sure its fair to go into a relationship when i'm carrying so much baggage. but we'll see. a bunch of us are going out to dinner on friday and i think he's going. kinda nervous though, it's not really my group of friends, but then again i dont really have one as of last june. but we'll see

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