• I had to go to my boyfriend's band concert thing last night. ergh. I'm only frustrated because I'm jealous that I didn't get in. That made me start thinking about how awfully mediocre I am. I'm not really good at anything, I'm just mediocre at a decent mix of things. It's stupid, and I hate it. So of course I had to sit through about a 2 hour very loud reminder of my mediocrity. And every time someone mentions it, it's like turning the knife in my chest. So it was 2 hours of knife turning too. At least if I bled out and died bitter, I would have been listening to really good music. Of course then I saw middle school friends, and I wondered if they remembered me. And then I wondered whether my life is worth anything at all. Typical downward spiral.

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