• Isn't it a long time since I wrote? Don't worry, I have been contributing to the site by adding lyrics by Ade Fenton. Anyway, as is made obvious by the title of this entry, I am currently unemployed. After I left college last year, I had a well paid, full-time job as a labourer in London. Then I went to university in October, but I ran out of money and didn't really like it so I left. Now I don't have a job so I haven't got any money. I used to be so rich (sort of), so now, poverty hurts all the more. Sigh. There are so many pressing responsibilities, and the sum of their pressure is more than I can afford. Literally, I really can't afford them, I have eighteen pounds in the bank. So how can I get a job? Maybe I should get some sleep and go to the Jobcentre tomorrow. That seems like a good idea. I know what I want to do. I want to do a full-time job involving hard physical labour... just like my old job. It wouldn't feel right to go back there though, and everyone would judge me in the way people so often do. Oh, and also, I have a girlfriend now. Of all the people to have a girlfriend, I would have thought I was the most unlikely, but I suppose I have changed since my last entries... but not in the way one might assume. All that's changed about me is that I'm now willing to look a girl in the eyes and tell her I love her when really, I quite like her. I tell her she's beautiful - what I mean is that she's not bad looking. I tell her she's incredible - I'm thinking she's fairly honest and reliable enough. I say she deserves the best, but I just think she deserves me. Still, one can't complain, eh? As far as I know, she is madly in love with me, and this way, I can go out without feeling the dreadful social need to 'pull', as my friends eloquently put it. So she's happy, and I'm happy too, and that is more than good enough for me. You might not think it to look at me, or even realise during a conversation with me, but I really am full of hatred for the way society works. Everything from having to work for others for money, to having to lie to people for contentment, I'm full of contempt for all of it.

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