• well, i really dont have a whole lot new to write about, my heart is just ever heavy beacuse of all of the things that have gone on in the last 3 weeks. I havent been able to get this girl off my mind more so then we we're together, it is really killing me, the saying holds true you never know what you have til it is gone, god do i miss and love you so much, im trying to make it easier on her by not showing my pain but everytime she says she has to go i know it is mainly beacuse of the fact that she thinks that for not being together we need to change how and how much we talk, and she said she still wants to be friends but I can't find the median bewteen still talking as friends and be the so much more then that i want to be. I really am trying to make it easier on her but she can her the pain in my voice, and then it kills me to hear her get depressed about it. so i need to find the happy median the one that makes her happy, i dont care about me, i just want her to be happy and know that i love her, i wish she would know how true that is. Dear god, please show me what i am suppose to do, and help us to sort everything out. I guess i'll find out what will become of us soon or really not soon enough, i dont want anyone elses reflection in my eye, just ours, i just want the girl i love in my arms and hold her so tight. I hope your lives are good thank you for listening to me ramble. God bless

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