• So, what a week right? Not I coudn't say the same. This week sucked just as much as last week event wise. I haven't hung out with my friends in two weeks and I think I'm dying, I think the first step of dying is that your nose starts to run full time. The second part of dying is denying that this isn't a cold. And the third step of dying.... is dying. So yesterday I took a trip down to New Jersey to look at some vacation spots down at the shore. I had to think of something interesting to do so I thought of this. If I could blow anything up, what would it be and why? First I thought I would blow up every house in a quarter mile radious of mine, just to shove it in everybodys face that they suck and my house is the best. Of course this excludes Fran and John's house since they are cool and they give me candy. Then as we went down the road I thought I'd bomb the house that just got a new extension on it since my family was too poor to get an extension onto our house. Then I bombed every fancy car I saw on the highway because I was driving in a shit 97 Ford Tourus PIECE OF SHIT OMFG. I through a huge bomb at every good looking girl I saw because I'd never have chance with them. And finally, I threw a bomb at myself because I couldn't live with all the killing I did. So yeah, when I got down there, besides all the dead bodies it was allright. walked around the beach, I couldn't stop thinking about how it would be when I get down there, how sunny and calm it was going to be, how so much different it was going to be from where I am now. How nothing is going to matter when I get down there. How I'll just be able to sit on the beach the whole day and just wonder if people are thinking about what I'm thinking about, and if people are looking at the same clouds I'm looking at. And if people are swimming in the same water I'm swimming in. Now onto personal life. Stephanie likes me. What I should do... I don't know really. I mean one part tells me I'm backing myself into a deep dark hole, and that the end started with Stephanie, but the other part wants me to go for it because I'm lonally and I need someone and that I'm just going crazy. When all else fails with one thing it just makes me want to goto another. Everything that has happened between me and Christina is GONE. Gone for good and everybody knows it. I know it. I admit it. I'm through with it. Instead of bitching and whining about this like I always do I'm just going to... FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO BITCH AND WHINE ABOUT..... TOMORROW. I'm trying out drawing. I conclude on that. No one is probably reading this line anyway because they ran away when I said I was drawing... oh well. -bill

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