• Yes. The Shriekback CD was almost everything I could have asked for. It has been over ten years since I heard songs like Newhome and My Careful Hands. I could have stayed up way too late listening to music. Hopefully, the office will close early today. I could use the break. Therapy tonight. Maybe I'm weird, but I look forward to my weekly sessions in a way. Of course, I also feel the usual apprehension of opening up and sharing portions of myself that were (previously) private. I often wonder what glimpses are opened into my psyche from the things I do openly discuss. How much of myself is revealed? How much is enough? How much is too much? I am ordinarily a private person. There are simply things about myself I don't want to make public, or at least share outside of a protected forum like this one. And, to some extent, there are probably things about me no one really wants to know. That doesn't necessarily mean I have secrets that need to be hidden out of necessity: I have not ever murdered anybody, I'm not a pedophile, and I do not owe the Mafia money. But, I still like to keep my personal life close to the vest. (anything I say from here going forward is not significantly personal, however embarassing). Like most Americans, I have filed taxes late and incorrectly. Like most Americans, and probably citizens of other countries as well, I have used the internet for pornographic entertainment. Like most Americans I've obscured the truth for my own benefit, whether it was calling in sick, or exagerating a recent accomplishment in order to impress the opposite sex. Nothing extraordinary, and yet, nothing I want casual observers to know: I prefer that I be the sole decision maker about major revalations, and minor ones too. However, I am serious about my current theraputic process, and have no desire to withhold information, or do anything to impede or sabotage my theraputic work. (on a side note, I also have little desire to discuss my sex life and proclivities with my therapist. However, if asked, I will be honest). I find myself wondering (on a completely unrelated topic) when the last Fourth of July was that fell on a Saturday. "Saturday, in the park. I think it was the Fourth of July..." Chicago. (sorry, that was another one of my moments). In any event, it sets me to wondering, what is it about anything that makes us uncomfortable in sharing? What makes a previously tabboo topic suddenly open territory? For example, what makes one girlfriend subject to sharing your pornography collection with, when several others were kept in the dark (even though you shared your lingere fetish with all of them)? It's a rhetorical question: I certainly expect no answers here. In any event, I'll share: I do not own a firearm, although I support the Second Ammendment. I do not read Hustler Magazine (anymore), although I once did, and support Larry Flynt in his defense of the First Ammendment. I've been fired from jobs in the past, for a variety of reasons. I've been unfaithful in relationships in the past. I prefer Creature From The Black Lagoon to Friday The 13th. Despite being in my 40s, I collect super-hero action figures. I enjoy Japanese Hentai. I once had a drug addition. I have been free from drugs however since 1985 (or so). I have used drugs with the specific intent of causing someone else injury. I was successful. I have been to Lords of Acid concerts, and enjoyed them, although not as much as I would have liked. I have never played Everquest, nor do I want to. I have had the one-night-stand. It was good. Okay, enough of that. Back to the music. Look at my favorites. Check out Hurrah. Great band. The album "Tell God I'm Here" is fantastic. It has the songs Walk In The Park, Miss This Kiss, How Many Rivers, and I Would If I Could.

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