• i love haning my baby, swan is just great, period, lol, i love to know our level of trust in each other, she makes me feel so good, i also am glad to knwo that she trusts me enough to want to go to the next step with me, i mean, her first time did not turn out well, but to know i healed her trust made me feel really good, due to the fact i have never gone that far, i have my small deal of worries and nervousness, i mean stuff can go wrong in that situation, and i dont know how i will be, and i just want to do good and for it all to go right for her sort of plesure out of it, i dont worry for me because well i know what she does to me and for me it will probably be pure plesure, but yeah it is mostly just first time nervousness , but really that isnt that big of a thought, and has gone down more due to how we have done in our more physical moments, what i have seem myself do to her so far really boosts my confidence in how it would be in that situation, and well makes me a little eager, and she should get a little confidence boost too, because those times have left me with a good impression, she can do things to me like no other, so whent the time comes i have her, and well when the time comes, when love is made, it should be amazing moving on, lol i have sorta felt her even more then usual lately, because home has be even worse for my baby, i mean i see it in her every morning, i wish something could happen to give her at least a little relief, of make her dad see what he is doing, i dont like seeing my baby like this, with all thats going on for her, my god can someone just give her a break already, oh well, all i can do is make her feel good for the time i am around her, help her all i can, make her feel as happy as i can, oh do i love her smile

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